If you're new here, you may want to subscribe to my Blog's RSS Feed. Or my Comment's RSS Feed. Your funny bone is definitely as big as your femur!

Lying increases the creative faculties, expands the ego, and lessens the frictions of social contacts.
- Clare Booth Luce

(Now you know why I lie so much)

The most exciting phrase to hear in science, the one that heralds new discoveries, is not ‘Eureka!’ (I found it!) but ‘That’s funny …’
- Isaac Asimov

(Like when I turned into a cannibal for a day and ate a clown and exclaimed, “That’s funny!”)

Nobody will ever win the Battle of the Sexes. There’s just too much fraternizing with the enemy.
- Henry Kissinger

(Now you know why nobody wins at my home)

Too bad the only people who know how to run the country are busy driving cabs and cutting hair.
- George Burns

(Makes you wonder why George Bush’s saloon didn’t break-even)

If this is coffee, please bring me some tea; but if this is tea, please bring me some coffee.
- Abraham Lincoln

(I am not the only confused soul in town)

The best car safety device is a rear-view mirror with a cop in it.
-Dudley Moore

(Looks like the cops the World over are like those we find in India)

From the moment I picked up your book until I laid it down, I was convulsed with laughter. Some day I intend reading it.
- Groucho Marx

(I am glad he died in 1977, else he would have said the same for my proposed book)

Update: Thirty minutes after I put up these quotes on Ouchmytoe, a gentleman mailed me. He asked: “So, where do you get such nice quotes from?”

I replied: “You know…times have changed. It is hard to get good quotes these days. So, I end up making them up myself!”

The gentleman is yet to reply. Wonder why.