Wish our real life had the benefits of online life
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Very recently I was asked to give a brief introduction of myself. Instead of playing with facts I played with words which made the introduction a good read but wasn’t an exact representation of the Jammy that I knew.
A week after that was written – I wondered how much fun it would be if…everything that was online…was in the real world too!
• If I hated my boss, I could just highlight him and delete him.
• If I wanted to enter a club which didn’t allow me inside, all I had to do was point my mouse on the club and click
• If I wanted to shift my job, no uploading of my resumes on Naukris of the World…I just needed to hit the Shift key
• If I knew my girl friend was dumping me, all I had to do was Right Click and Copy…when she was gone…just do a Paste. Bingo!
• If two girls were gossiping and I wanted to eavesdrop, I could just plug my earphones and increase the volume
• If I saw a pretty girl on the road, I could do a Print Screen and save her for later
• If I had a flat tire all I had to do was press F1 and get help
• If in a meeting, nobody was listening to my thoughts…I could put the CAPS Lock on and say whatever I wanted
• If I read the intensions of a girl at work wrong…I could always use the Backspace key and start afresh.
If you can think of anything better, please don’t shy from sharing it with the rest of the World.
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SPAM = Somebody’s Patience Almost Murdered
Driverless cars…the repercussions
Where the hell is computerization?
Client Calls in IT Companies
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* If missing wife press home to reach home
* If GF is nagging too much press End to finish off the relation
* If your anger goes out of the hands, just press the ctrl button.
* To know abt someone, what they he/she upto? Just hit the tab key.
If everything is online, won’t you be in it as well? Someone wud be watching you in YouTube, so beware. Do stay encrypt yourself.
If hubby or boyfriend has a roving eye and keeps eyeing girls that pass by, one could use SCROLL LOCK.
cntr+alt+del to restart fresh discussions with hubby..
Instead of braces, one can align teeth using div tag with “padding:0”
visible=false…..ta-da you’ve disappeared!
I always miss the following in real life
1) Ctrl F - Search function - have you lost your socks or towel or papers or keys? why can’t you just press Ctrl F and find it like on your laptop? grrr
2) Ctrl C & Ctrl V - Copy-Paste - why is copy-paste not available in real life? if you see someone eating a chocolate just copy-paste one in your hand. or a guy’s bank account has lot of zero’s in the end . you guessed it.
Ive always wanted a Ctrl Z for some goofups I persist on making.
“Search” for the ‘perfect’ life - just click on the search button,give ur preferences and bingo!
“Run” ur preferences….
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About Jamshed V Rajan
He is online 18 hours a day. Chat with him on jv.rajan[@]gmail.com or call him on 09971996581.
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