Walking the distance

In the last couple of days I have realized that Ouchmytoe readers (and that means YOU!) only like funny articles. I also have a feeling you prefer articles targeting Rekha more than anything else. So, here is a promise – will try and include Rekha in each post of mine for the next one week. Anybody who first spots a post without Rekha`s mention…wins an affordable gift. A serious gift!

Green is my favorite color. Maybe because green represents peace and prosperity. Or maybe because I love peas…esp when served as mutter panner. Or maybe because I get jealous at the drop of a hat.

The day Sonia Gandhi relinquished the Prime Minister`s chair and asked Dr Manmohan Singh to be the PM, I was terribly jealous of the new Prime Minister. What did he have that I didn`t? He had studied Economics, but I had also been a BA Economics student at The American College, Madurai. He had a ‘Doctor` before his name…but I had also almost passed the Pre-Medical/Pre-dental exam. Only when my mother pointed out that Sonia had chosen Dr Manmohan because he stayed in New Delhi, did I relent. My mother said interacting for important matters with someone staying in New Delhi would any day be easier than interacting with a person in Madurai. Like always, my mother made sense.

As luck would have it, my mother couldn`t stop me from marrying another jealous lady – Rekha. The other day she looked at my calendar and asked me who June was. She wouldn`t listen when I told her June was not the name of a girl!

Anyway, yesterday, when having lunch, Rekha called and said: “Did you read Kiruba`s blog (www.kiruba.com)? He has cycled from Bangalore to Chennai.”

“Has he?”

“Yes.” Rekha knew I was already jealous.

“Must be lying!”

“No, he is not. He has put up pictures from the trip.” Rekha was hell bent on making me jealous. Girls have the ability to program themselves. Things like ‘OK, let me be focussed for 3 minutes and 24 seconds and after that I will ease out` come naturally to them.

In turn, men are totally different. We can`t stay focused. The other day I was supposed to scream at this pretty team-mate of mine for not doing what I had asked for but I ended up saying, “Nice noodle strap. Where did you get that?”

In the next one hour I had read Kiruba`s post on the trip and decided to do something similar. Not being a person who procrastinates, I decided that in the evening, I will walk all the way home. A cool thirteen kilometers …but if Kiruba can cycle 332 kilometers in less than 37 hours…Jammy can also walk 13 kilometers. I asked my driver to take the car home.

Mind you, walking is not that easy. One kilometer after I started walking, I decided to take an auto….but couldn`t get any. After four kilometers of walking, it struck me that I could ask for a lift. It took me ten minutes to realize that when the roads are lonely, no biker stops. After walking nine kilometers…I reached a bus stop. I stood in the stop for a while but all busses were crowed. So decided to walk again…when I was only 100 meters from my house, one guy on a Yamaha overtook me and stopped. I looked at him. He said: “Would you want me to give you a lift?” I stared at him for a few seconds and walked away.

Moral of the Story: Never be jealous. Jealousy is all the fun YOU think they had, when they had nothing!

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