If you’re new here, you may want to subscribe to my Blog’s RSS Feed. Or my Comment’s RSS Feed. Your funny bone is definitely as big as your femur!If you drive with your wife IN your car, you have probably experienced this. If you drive with your wife ON your car, you are probably a happy man by now. God bless her.
Yesterday, for the millionth time I got scolded for being a careless driver. The only thing I ever did was rip the right arm of a pedestrian. For …

Did you know that Ouchmytoe has gone live with a Cricket Blog? If you knew it… great, but if you didn’t know it…don’t even bother….it is just a bunch of links put together for AdSense revenue. 
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Today, I missed the Australian innings of the India vs Australia Champions Trophy match. As usual, Rekha was the culprit. It just isn’t cricket when your wife latches on to the cricket fever and talks all cricket. Whoever said, cricket was a gentleman’s game!
After the Indians had scored 249, the Aussies were just taking the …

Believe it or not, this is quite a ritual. It is not as easy as picking up the phone and calling them over for lunch. I wanted to call a NCC mate of mine home and this is what happened.
“Rekha we need to call Derek Lesley home,” I said casually even as I changed the channel from AsiaNet to Sun TV. Rekha being a Malayali always watches AsiaNet, while I being a Tamilian stick to Sun TV. 
“If you can change the channel back to AsiaNet, we can talk.”
Needless to say, …

Yesterday, I got a message from Rakesh Bhandari, a regular Ouchmytoe reader. Ouchmytoe now share it with the junta to generate more smiles per joke.
The Funny Joke
Man: If I want to have a really long life, what do I do?
Doc: Get married.
Man: But how will that help?
Doc: The thought of long life will never come to your mind.
If you have anything funny you want to share, please message me at 0988391221 or mail me at jammy [@] ouchmytoe [dot] com. If you want me to attempt a funny article on …

A few of my fans were upset that I was being a MCP by only showcasing my photograph on this Blog. I really can’t carry Rekha’s photo in the top mast because if I do, I will start looking handsome! 
OK fine…I relent. Here is a photograph of my wife as can be seen in the Metropolitan Museum of Art, New York City. Why is her photograph showcased at the Metropolitan Museum of Art? That’s because I had taken that photograph (during our courtship days) and it had won an international …

Even for one moment, I don’t want you to believe that the Vacancy Available advertisement I gave in The Hindu dated September 30, had any sexual intension.
Here is what the advertisement said:
A handsome young man (I am 31 years old) is looking for an understanding, compassionate lady partner to be his mistress. The applicant should understand English and should be well-versed in Internet (I travel quite a bit and for six months in a year will be in touch only thro’ mails). I believe that looks don’t maketh a …

One of the Ouchmytoe.com readers mailed this short piece and asked me to upload it on the blog. Not willing to disappoint her, here goes -
A married man left from work early one Friday afternoon. Instead of going home, however, he squandered the weekend (and his salary) partying with the boys.When he finally returned home on Sunday night, he ran into a barrage of abuse from his wife. After a couple of hours of nagging and berating, his wife asked “How would you like it if you didn’t see me …

I can now say that I am a much married man. I say ‘much married’ because we crossed our second wedding anniversary on 8th September. Despite the body and mind willing (actually, more of the body) I haven’t married many times. 
Have you notices that the word “Harried” rhymes with the word “Married”? Now you know why Prince Charles and Princess Diana named their son Harry when their marriage got sour. They were letting the World know that they were plain-and-simple harried with each other.
Moving on to today’s topic…after two years …