Dear foreigner, here is a guide to India

This blog post is inspired by another blog called “Our Delhi Struggle” (Click here to check it out), where Dave & Jenny chronicle their ‘struggles` in Delhi. Guess what, Harper Collins has offered them a book deal (and when is my turn?). Their blog posts are keen insights into what people like you and me take for granted here in Delhi (and India). A must read, if you can laugh at yourself and your countrymen. Unlike Rohinton Mistry, who makes loads of money by selling India`s suffering…Dave & Jenny`s ‘struggles` always seem to have a positive side.

After reading their blog inside out (and NOT leaving a comment), I thought why not come up with an India guide for foreigner in typical Ouchmytoe ishtyle. I have opted for the question & answer format. Here goes…

Guides
Guide those that don't know.

I will be traveling to India next week. Is it safe?

– Albert Sutherland, London

Dear Albert, India isn`t safe. We have 2000+ languages and 10+ top religions which result in a lot of misunderstanding & confusion. I wouldn`t advice you to take this extreme step right away. I would suggest, you participate in the British version of ‘Fear Factor‘, win it and then try a visit to India. Sometimes we even torture the moderator who comes in to solve our problems. Heard what happened to the UN Envoy who came in to solve India`s problems with Pakistan? Our President gifted him a starkly pungent lemon pickle, and he is now suffering it daily in Berlin. Three times a day.

After getting down at the airport what do I do?

– Margery Blair, California

Dear Margery, While getting down from the plane, feel the earth under you before keeping your foot down. Thanks to India`s enemies all over the World – Pakistan, Afghanistan, US, Sri Lanka, Russia, Osama Land etc – every step in India is a landmine. We haven`t invested in mine removers because our Government`s population control programs are anyway doing badly. But don`t you worry…Jaipur, the capital of Rajasthan specializes in False foot.

Once you get down and escape the landmines head straight for the baggage pick up area. An airlines executive who is already hand in glove with the auto rickshaw drivers & the hotels will guide you to what is best for you.

Are auto rickshaws in India safe for human beings to travel?

– Ronald Brown, New York

Dear Ronald, auto Rickshaws aren`t safe for human beings. Their drivers are always on the look out for pale skins (if you guys can call us dark skinned?!). The Indian Government has tried to curb their menace many a times but they always escape convincing the court that they are in the business of taking people for a ride. Here is a tip I can give you: Look out for a religious autorickshaw driver, because they are less likely to cheat. You can identify religious autorickshaw driver by the red (or yellow or orange depending on the sub caste he belongs to) tikka on his forehead, at least 2-3 Tulsi necklaces etc.

If I am in India for a week, where can I stay?

– Adele Becker, Berlin

Dear Adele, staying under the bridge is definitely not a good idea though you will see 10% of India living there. Staying with an Indian friend would be the best idea. Unlike many other countries where a guest needs to call up and arrive and also mention the time by when he/she will leave…in India, guests are God. Remember, this doesn`t mean that you will get to smoke and drink inside the house….especially, in front of the women. If you plan to stay for the night, you might end up sleeping with a newly married couple, two grand parents and three grand children…in a single room. It doesn`t always happen but generally by 3 a.m. the room starts smelling of Dal Makhni (pulses!).

How do I find an address in India?

– Allen Solly, Switzerland

If you have the luxury of hiring a driver, that would be the best way. But if you don`t have that luxury, the best way to find an address in India would be to get it written down on a piece of paper in Hindi or the regional language of the area (one of the 2000+ languages that`s spoken in the country) before setting out. The right people to ask for directions would be people sitting under trees, people having chai at the tea stall, people smoking at the bus stop or people just standing opposite Girls high schools & colleges. The instructions are always ‘go straight and turn right` because we Indians always believe in what is right. I would recommend confirming the directions given by Person 1 by asking a Person 2, for sometimes…we Indians consider every foreigner to be British and thus try to punish him/her for their atrocities on us for 400 years by sending them in the opposite direction.

Does India have electricity?

– Pappe Singh, Canada

Dear Pappe…no, we don`t have electricity. All those stories of India`s Information Technology Enabled Services sector worth 40 billion annually is hog wash. Our computers run on Gobar gas. The electricity is retrieved from the dung of millions of cows, and transferred to a central repository in a city called Patna (in Bihar) via thin wires attached to the rear end of every cow. If you have already visited India and didn`t spot these wires, let me assure you that these are invisible to the untrained eye. As for our bulbs & fans, we run them on what is known as Man gas, which is extracted using the same technology but the wires are fixed to the rear end of 40+ Indian men bred daily on pulses. I am surprised your parents & grand parents didn`t tell you about the bad India they left behind while escaping on horse back.

Does India have mobile phones?

– Anthony Clark, Australia

Dear Anthony…no, we don`t have mobile phones. In fact, the last phone that was photographed in India was brought in by George Bush as a gift for our Prime Minister Dr Manmohan Singh. But since we don`t have telecom operators, Dr Singh uses it like a watch. We all carry small drums wherever we go and convey our messages by drumming. We have codes for every possible scenario….for example, 186 loud hits on the drum mean the person drumming is in danger and 1239 hits on the drum mean the nearby building is on fire. For long distance messaging we climb a hill or one of the bridges. Sometimes we also climb trees, but that`s only if the mango season is on. However, you can bring your mobile phone to India. If it doesn`t get stolen and sold in the chor market, you can use it to check time and date.

Do they accept credit cards in India or should I carry cash?

– Maria Carter, Los Angeles

In land locked regions, it is best to carry sea shells. For instance, shop keepers in Delhi will give you anything in exchange for 10 sea shells. In coastal regions, where lifestyle is a bit more relaxed and sea shells isn`t in demand, it is best to use shiny silk cloth, cigarettes, lighters, rum bottles etc to trade. As you would have guessed by now, no…we don`t use cash…leave alone credit card. The Indian Government is trying hard to introduce currency system in the country but is unable to decide whose photograph has to be used in the notes (and the coins). As of now the country is split into two – our supporting our biggest movie star Amitabh Bacchan and the other wanting our best cricketer Sachin Tendulkar to decorate our currency.

If I don`t know the local language, what can I do?

– David Miller, New Zealand

If you don`t know the language, the best bet is to keep mum. See if you can dye your hair, apply soot on your face & hands and become one of us – dark skinned, that is. If you have already come to India with a lot of Melanin, you stand a good chance of learning our language. If you didn`t already know, we Indians offer best business opportunities to people who come in to perpetuate the 419 Nigerian scam. There is another way around…if you are a girl and are pretty, you can join a Reality Show program on television. Since you are a girl, every man on the show will come to your rescue and teach you Hindi.

Will I find medicines in India? Or should I pack everything from here itself?

– Barbara Young, Norway

Nope, we don`t have medicines. Since all our doctors are in US, UK, Canada and Gulf…we are being forced to live our life without doctors. Not that we care, we just walk up the mountain whenever we are suffering from fever, pluck the purple flowers, walk back in the heat, grind it to a paste and then eat it to cure ourselves of the viral fever. Just in case you are curious…for Typhoid, we dive deep in the sea for a particular type of Oyster. We claim to have eradicated chicken pox and polio, but it is very common to see poultry hopping around on one leg. One of the reasons why we never bothered about getting medicines into the country is because Britishers taught us to write ‘sick letters` before they left: “Dear sir/madam, Since I am suffering from fever I won`t be able to attend classes today. Please grant me one day leave. Yours obediently, XXX”

Do wild animals roam around the streets of India. I have heard India have cows…?

– Vivian Campbell, Trinidad & Tobago

Yes! Wild animals are everywhere in India. That`s why we don`t go outdoors after 6 p.m.. You should know that our wild animals have different weekday & weekend timings. On weekdays, they hunt from 6 p.m. to 6 a.m. and on weekdays they retire early at around 12 midnight. The Indian Government has worked out a three pronged strategy for improving our living conditions. Our leaders have advised us to light a fire in front of our houses every evening – first it keeps the wild animals away, second it keeps us warm and third it provides light for our children to study. On the subject of cows, yes BBC is right…we do have lots of cows in India.

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Nuclear bombs, Indian Ocean and secret agents

MN Devarajan was a nice fellow. Just that he always managed to put me in trouble. Back then, my father had a Bajaj Chetak scooter…and Devarajan sowed the seeds of inferiority complex in me by saying that his father went to office in a helicopter.

I continued to feel bad about this for a long time…till, another classmate came up to me and said, “My father is starting on a new job tomorrow. He is going to work on moon.”

Back then, my desk was my store house for used chewing gum…whenever I didn`t have money to buy new ones, I would pluck one from under my desk and start chewing. One day, when I was selecting one of the dry chewing gums stuck under my desk, Devarajan asked me: “Have you ever been scared of secret agents?”

“I have seen them in movies….never really been scared of them. Why?” I asked.

Only the previous day, my father had told me that Issac Newton was an intelligent man because he asked a lot of questions. Since then, I had asked 1024 questions. But unlike all others till now, Deverajan didn`t answer my question. Instead, he pulled me closer and whispered into my ears: “Can you keep a secret?”

“Yes!” I whispered back.

One job done, Rekha is looking for another

After studying for six years – from 1994 to 2000, my wife Rekha joined Sify as the Product Manager for their Entertainment Channel.

Back then, I used to work for Sify as Product Manager for their Sports Channel. That`s when she met me and fell head over heels for me. Despite my continuous refusals she continued to chase me and finally managed to wear me down. I agreed to marry her, disappointing many other girls who were in the queue.

Job
Pity we have to do jobs to survive

The day we got married, we decided that only one of us will work for Sify. For obvious reasons, of course. How was I supposed to oogle at girls, if my wife was around to watch me?

Being the braver of the two, she decided to quit the job she loved and join Sify`s E-Learning team (which sat in a different building/office). While at Sify`s E-Learning team, she worked on projects for GE, Hyperion, Caterpillar, Northrop Grumman Defence Systems etc.

Within a year, her fame spread amongst the Instructional Designers of Chennai (at least that`s what she made me believe!) and got a call from Congnizant Technologies…which she readily accepted.

After spending two years with Cognizant Technologies and working with clients such as Pfizer and PeopleSoft….something nice happened….Rhea, our daughter was born.

If Rekha had continued to work, she would have had a glittering career now. Maybe, better than mine….but she didn`t. She gave up all that without even an iota of second thoughts because she wanted to be around for Rhea & her learnings.

It has been two and a half years since…and Rhea has turned out to be a smart girl. She joined Play School two months back and got promoted to nursery a week back. Even though she is just two and a half years old…Rhea is a almost a complete woman…she covers her mouth when she coughs, and says ‘Sorry` afterwards, she reads books, knows all the rhymes, dances to music, can play a drum, doesn`t watch TV, says ‘namaste` to elders…the list can go on. All thanks to Rekha. All that I ever did was buy Rhea a chocolate on an odd weekend.

Having done her bit for her daughter, Rekha now wants to get back to work. She wants that adrenalin rush that she used to experience when a call was due with an angry client, in the next five minutes. In short, she is looking for a job.

At this stage, she wants something that she can do from home. After a year or so, she will start exploring opportunities that require her to be in office.

If you think you have something she can work on, you can download her resume here (60 Kb, Doc File) >> Downloaded times <<

Email exchanges between five consenting, cheating adults

This blog post has been inspired by a book called ‘E` written by Matt Beaumont, a talented writer. The book is set in an Ad Agency called Miller Shanks in London and is written as a series of mails. Just mails exchanged between the colleagues and nothing else. So, here is my attempt in copying that style. Buy the Book Here

eMail Exchanges
As much as possible, avoid eMail exchanges. Call instead.

The five characters in this story are:

JV Rajan: A 34 year old male internet addict working with ibibo.com

Rekha TP: Rajan`s wife, who has mothered a two and a half year old baby called Rhea with Rajan and has just now entered the 6th year of marriage.

Priyanka Chopra: Rajan`s love interest. A 29 year old Delhi girl who also loves Rajan

Biju Anand: Rekha`s love interest. He first proposed to Rekha when they were in standard 10 together. Is still unmarried and hopes for the thunder to wipe out Rajan.

Rakesh Jha: Priyanka`s full time boyfriend. An engineering student who has been looking for a job for the last two years

This set of emails begin on October 20, when Rajan comes to know that he has to go to Cape Town, South Africa for a few days.

– – – X – – –

20 October, 2009 | 4.00 p.m.
From: jv.rajan@gmail.com
To: priyanka-chopra@gmail.com
CC:
BCC:
Subject: Traveling

Hey Love, I will have to catch a flight for Cape Town on 25th Oct. And am back only on 30th. Can`t make it this weekend. Save yourself for me (also save the pink one for the weekend after). So what do you want from Cape Town?

Love,
R

– – – X – – –

20 October, 2009 | 4.03 p.m.
From: jv.rajan@gmail.com
To: Rekha.tp@gmail.com
CC:
BCC:
Subject: Official Travel

I will be off for a few days to South Africa. Pack my green trolley. Dress code: Casual.

Cheers

– – – X – – –

20 October, 2009 | 7.13 p.m.
From: priyanka-chopra@gmail.com
To: jv.rajan@gmail.com
CC:
BCC:
Subject: Re: Traveling

That`s so sweet love. I will so …so…so…miss you. I will save the pink for you. Did I tell you about the new black one? Promise me we will meet the next weekend…can`t wait to pounce on you. By the way, I have also bought tiger & rabbit paint. Now decide soon what you want to become when we meet – tiger or rabbit?

What will you bring me? Something real small, and needless to say expensive.

Your dearie,
PC

– – – X – – –

20 October, 2009 | 8.53 p.m.
From: Rekha.tp@gmail.com
To: jv.rajan@gmail.com
CC:
BCC:
Subject: Re: Official Travel

I have packed your stuff. Though, you could have also done it at leisure – it is five more days to your travel. Rhea will miss you.

And are you traveling alone or with colleagues? Are the travel dates fixed? Or are you expecting a change?

When are you reaching home? Food is ready….should I heat it now?

Your wifey,
Rekha

– – – X – – –

20 October, 2009 | 9.13 p.m.
From: Rekha.tp@gmail.com To:
CC: biju-anand@live.com
BCC:
Subject: We can meet again!

Sweetheart, I have some good news and bad news. My husband is traveling again. The bad news is, he is out of the country only for five days- from 26th to 30th of this month. You think you can make it to Gurgaon?

I know…all the cocaine has left your wallet empty. But I can buy you tickets, if you promise to wake up when Gurgaon arrives? With so much security, can`t risk air travel with you can we?

Can`t use my credit card…so will have to go to the railway booking center…so you need to tell me in advance.

Your true love,
Rekha

– – – X – – –

20 October, 2009 | 9.10 p.m.
From: jv.rajan@gmail.com
To: Rekha.tp@gmail.com
CC:
BCC:
Subject: Re: Official Travel

I am leaving in another five minutes. Keep food warm. Am tired, so will hit the bed right after dinner.

The start date of the travel is fixed. But might get extended to the weekend…and we might be forced to see the South African Safari. Apparently, there is a Tiger-Rabbit chase that is nice to watch.

Cheers

– – – X – – –

20 October, 2009 | 7.13 p.m.
From: jv.rajan@gmail.com
To: priyanka-chopra@gmail.com

CC:
BCC:
Subject: Re: Traveling

My apple pie…I am trying to tell my wife that my stay in South Africa might get extended. We can then spend the whole weekend together. Will your neighbors turn suspicious? Though, I wonder how they can get suspicious if we spend all the time inside your bedroom.

Between the Tiger and the Rabbit…eat me! You know how much I love it when you hunt me down, pin me to the wall and eat me. Let`s not change the roles please.

Black then, if I manage to extend SA trip unofficially and spend the weekend with you.

My boring house wife is waiting for me to reach home early and have our dinner while watching Big Boss Season 3. Pity Me.

Love,
R

– – – X – – –

21 October, 2009 | 3.13 a.m.
From: biju-anand@live.com
To: Rekha.tp@gmail.com
CC:
BCC:
Subject: Re: We can meet again!

I would so love to visit Gurgaon when your husband is away. When you courier me the tickets also send in at least Rs 5000 in cash. I need money to spend on my way – it is at least 2 days by train.

What do you want from here in Kerala?

Your true love,
Biju Baby

– – – X – – –

21 October, 2009 | 10.45 a.m.
From: Rekha.tp@gmail.com
To: jv.rajan@gmail.com
CC:
BCC:
Subject: Meeting a Girl Friend

I won`t be home from 12 noon to 4 p.m.. I am meeting an ex-colleague of mine. Don`t surprise yourself by coming home for lunch…I won`t be there.

How is work? I hope all preparations are on for your SA trip. I know how much you want to go to South Africa – I hope the trip is on and there are no last minute cancellations.

Wifey,
Rekha

– – – X – – –

21 October, 2009 | 11.05 a.m.
From: jv.rajan@gmail.com
To: Rekha.tp@gmail.com
CC:
BCC:
Subject: Re: Meeting a Girl Friend

No sweat. I will be busy at work as well. Carry on. Pass on my love to this girl friend of yours. Have I seen her?

Yours sincerely,
Rajan

– – – X – – –

21 October, 2009 | 7.13 p.m.
From: jv.rajan@gmail.com
To: priyanka-chopra@gmail.com

CC:
BCC:
Subject: Excitement

I am so thrilled thinking of spending the whole weekend together. Why didn`t you respond to my question on neighbours?

Love,
R

– – – X – – –

21 October, 2009 | 7.23 p.m.
From: priyanka-chopra@gmail.com
To: jv.rajan@gmail.com
CC:
BCC:
Subject: Re: Excitement

Was held up with work sweetheart. I am also really thrilled…been a long while since we did some role playing. Spending the weekend is fine.

Have told my neighbours already that my brother will be visiting me next weekend.

You haven`t responded to my question on the gift. I heard South Africa is good with diamonds? Apparently, they have lots of diamond mines. Check this Wikipedia link if you don`t believe me – http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mining_industry_of_South_Africa

Your apple pie in black,
P

– – – X – – –

21 October, 2009 | 7.25 p.m.
From: priyanka-chopra@gmail.com
To: rakesh.jha@hotmail.com
CC:
BCC:
Subject: My apologies

Dear Rakesh,

Looks like we have to change our plans for the next weekend. I might have to go to Chandigargh for a research. My boss will be traveling with me so will be inaccessible by phone as well.

Will buzz you the moment I am back in Gurgaon. Most likely Sunday evening.

Don`t worry, will save both the pink and black for you. I have bought Tiger paint and rabbit paint….waiting to see you wear the tiger paint and pounce on me.

Your lovey-dovey,
Priyanka

– – – X – – –

21 October, 2009 | 8.26 p.m.
From: Rekha.tp@gmail.com
To: biju-anand@live.com
CC:
BCC:
Subject: Re: Re: We can meet again!

Just couriered you your railway tickets. Had Rs 4000 in hand…have couriered that too.

Don`t carry too much cocaine…sometimes there are police in the trains as well. And don`t snort before you hit the bed in the train…Gurgaon station isn`t the last station and don`t want to waste time driving to Jaipur to pick you up.

Remember, you did this when Rajan last went to South Africa?

Travel light…you can use Rajan`s clothes.

All I want from Kerala, is the true love that I saw in your eyes when I was in class ten.

Your true love,
Rekha

– – – X – – –

22 October, 2009 | 4.41 p.m.
From: jv.rajan@gmail.com
To: priyanka-chopra@gmail.com
CC:
BCC:
Subject: Re: Re: Excitement

I get the hint lady. To get a diamond, I might have to use the credit card which could mean trouble (the statement comes home, you see).

Will try and get something real nice for you – something that`s small but not necessarily as costly as a diamond.

Wish we could go together…would have been awesome. The weather is also cold and windy…we could have stayed indoors the whole trip. But unfortunately, this is an official trip.

Your brown bunny,
Rajan

– – – X – – –

22 October, 2009 | 4.51 p.m.
From: jv.rajan@gmail.com
To: rekha.tp@gmail.com

CC:
BCC:
Subject: Gift

So, what do you want from Cape Town? Ask for something that a young girl like you would want…something that`s small and yet not as costly as a diamond. You know that with the EMIs we have to pay, I won`t be able to afford a diamond for you.

Your hubby,
Rajan

– – – X – – –

22 October, 2009 | 7.53 p.m.
From: rekha.tp@gmail.com
To: jv.rajan@gmail.com

CC:
BCC:
Subject: Re: Gift

I will tell you what I want from Cape Town, after we finish watching Big Boss Season 3. Hope that`s fine.

But why the sudden affection?

Your wifey,
Rekha

– – – X – – –

22 October, 2009 | 8.15 p.m.
From: rakesh.jha@hotmail.com
To: priyanka-chopra@gmail.com
CC:
BCC:
Subject: Re: My apologies

Priyanka,

Hope your boss and you are booked in different rooms. Remember, I have friends in Chandigarh who can come and check on you if I suspect anything.

What are you getting for me from Chandigarh?

Your dude,
Rakesh

– – – X – – –

23 October, 2009 | 4.15 p.m.
From: biju-anand@live.com
To: Rekha.tp@gmail.com
CC:
BCC:
Subject: Re: Re: Re: We can meet again!

Got the tickets and the money. You are a sweetheart.

I have already started practicing kissing in front of the mirror, so that I don`t disappoint when we meet.

I promise not to fill the slot I have created on my shoe`s sole for cocaine. I will only fill it half….because I love you and respect your concerns.

Do Gurgaon police accept bribe? I have lost weight since we last met, so Rajan`s clothes won`t fit me…and it won`t look nice if we go out. But then, do we have plans to go outdoors? I would rather we stayed at home. What say?

Your true Malayali love,
Biju Baby

– – – X – – –

23 October, 2009 | 6.44 p.m.
From: priyanka-chopra@gmail.com
To: jv.rajan@gmail.com
CC:
BCC:
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Excitement

OK fine I forgive you. Don`t get me something that`s small and costly. If it isn`t a diamond, I want something that`s big and also costly.

You can take cash from India, you know…if you want to avoid the credit card.

By what time do you think we will wind up on Sunday evening? I wanted to know because I have to make a couple of office related calls on Sunday evening.

Your apple pie (now in sky blue),
P

– – – X – – –

23 October, 2009 | 6.48 p.m.
From: jv.rajan@gmail.com
To: rekha.tp@gmail.com

CC:
BCC:
Subject: Gift – Change of mind

I have changed my mind on what to get you from Cape Town. Now, I want it to be something that`s big and also costly. What would it be? Anything in particular that comes to your mind? Give me couple of options.

And don`t mail back saying you will tell me after watching Big Boss Season 3….you always sleep off by the time it ends.

Your hubby,
Rajan

– – – X – – –

23 October, 2009 | 7.28 p.m.
From: rekha.tp@gmail.com
To: jv.rajan@gmail.com
CC:
BCC:
Subject: Re: Gift – Change of mind

Frankly, I only want you to come back safely. Always keep me informed on what you are doing and where you are….that is all I ask. Nothing else.

Your hubby,
Rajan

October 24 & 25 were Saturday and Sunday….and nobody checked or responded to mails. And Rajan, left for Cape Town on Sunday evening.

26 October, 2009 | 4.22 p.m.
From: jv.rajan@gmail.com
To: rekha.tp@gmail.com
CC:
BCC:
Subject: Reached

Reached Cape Town. Good room with a good view. Busy now…have to rush for conference. Will call you later.

I am coming back only by Sunday late night. That`s confirmed.

Your hubby,
Rajan

– – – X – – –

26 October, 2009 | 4.22 p.m.
From: jv.rajan@gmail.com
To: priyanka-chopra@gmail.com
CC:
BCC:
Subject: Reached

Hey my crispy finger chips,
Have reached Cape Town. The flight took off on time and had good company during the flight. The air hostess were nothing when compared against you….where do these airlines recruit from anyway? Jharkhand Hinterland?

My room has excellent view and wish you were here. We could have just wrapped the soft, white blankets and stood next to the huge windows and watched the yatchs though out the day.

There is a huge bath tub as well, where we could have played a Pomfret and a Piranha game as well. I miss you.

The conference begins only tomorrow…and nothing to do now besides staring at the sea from my room. Catch you when you come online.

Your fruit cake walking naked,
Rajan

– – – X – – –

26 October, 2009 | 8.20 p.m.
From: rekha.tp@gmail.com
To: jv.rajan@gmail.com
CC:
BCC:
Subject: Re: Reached

Both Rhea and I miss you. Got late in replying because had gone to pick up a girl friend of mine from the railway station. Her first time in Gurgaon…no actually second time….and she needed a place to stay. I have asked her to stay with us.

Focus on the conference. Don`t need to call…I can understand. Just drop in a mail whenever you have time and I will respond

Waiting for it to be Sunday. 

Your wifey,
Rekha

– – – X – – –

26 October, 2009 | 9.22 p.m.
From: priyanka-chopra@gmail.com
To: jv.rajan@gmail.com
CC:
BCC:
Subject: Re: Reached

My dear, Hyderabadi Chicken Briyani,

Wish I was there too. You are making me yearn for you….now I have that tingling sensation that I have whenever I think of you.

I will try and see if there is a Pomfret and a Piranha paint that`s available in the market. Maybe not in a bath tub…but we could at least play that game under the shower. Should I ask for water proof colors?

I will always be in your thoughts. And listen…you don`t need to waste your money on international calls…just drop in mails whenever possible and I will respond. OK?

Nothing here too,
Priyanka

– – – X – – –

26 October, 2009 | 9.28 p.m.
From: prinyanka-chopra@gmail.com
To: rakesh.jha@hotmail.com
CC:
BCC:
Subject: Can you come?

Hey Rakesh,

Tried your mobile couple of times…it is switched off. Can you come now? I have that tingling sensation that comes up whenever I feel like meeting you?

Thought, if we can`t meet the coming weekend why not meet now itself?

Your spice girl,
P

The mails & the relationships continued well into the future…

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Funny Post 2: When my mom boards the airplane…
Funny Post 3: Do all married men need mistresses?

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