Getting drugged slowly but steadily

Yesterday I took my grandmother to a hospital nearby. She had been coughing the whole night and I thought if I could fix her a meeting with the 65-year-old general physician nearby, she would be happy.

My grandma had a ball of a time. The doctor held her hand (he said he was checking the pulse, but I don`t believe him) which made me turn my head away. When he continued his small talk beyond the customary ten minutes I had to excuse myself from the room.

While waiting outside, I realized the biggest truth of our times. Medicines are really costly and beyond the reach of the average IT professional who earns only INR 75,000 per month. I didn`t believe when my friends said drugs were costly but now I believe them.

Talking of drugs, I once tried sniffing coke. It managed it well for a while but couldn`t do anything once the straw stuck in my nose. Guess sniffing coke is no longer fashionable. But there was a time….a time when the world was normal and people took drugs to make it weird. Unfortunately, now the world is weird but people take anti-depressants to make it normal.

Coming back to drugs…I remember Art Buchwald writing in one of his columns that medicines in US were so costly that people had started storing them in their bank lockers.

While my thoughts were racing across the Atlantic ocean, I saw an investment banker walk into the pharmacy and ask: “What is the costliest tablet you have?”

While a confused Jammy looked at the investment banker, the pharmacist as a matter of fact replied: “You can either buy InvestiPill which costs INR 78,000 per tablet or go for CeleSave which costs INR 81,499.99 per tablet.”

I had never known that such pills existed. The tablets I ever bought – and I wonder whom I should thank for that …God because he ensured I wouldn`t need costly pills or our family doctor who never prescribed them – were Saridon, Anacin, Dart or at the max Strepcils. Mind you, they are very cheap pills costing INR 1 each.

I moved closer to the pharmacy counter and asked: “Sir, the gentleman who just paid you INR 2,34,000 and bought three Investipills never showed you a prescription.”

“Looks like you don`t invest,” the pharmacist said.

“No I don`t. In fact, that is one of the reasons why my wife and I fight over the morning coffee.” I shot back.

“Are you saying you are not aware of the increasing drug prices?”

I replied in the negative.

At my second consecutive reply in the negative the pharmacist didn`t reply. Perhaps he didn`t want to talk to me.

Even as I was leaving, I saw an old man walk towards the pharmacy. He had snow like white hair and was using a walking stick to balance himself. I took a step towards him and asked: “Sir, do you remember the good old times when medicines used to be cheaper?”

“I am sorry…I don`t know what you are talking about. BTW, does this pharmacy have tablets for Alzheimers?”

Other Must Reads

On why I hate old men in post offices with a postcard in their hand
Tale of a dead towel
I drink, therefore I am
Kissing – how it all began
On why I hate Nursery Rhymes

By Jamshed V Rajan

Jammy, as Jamshed V Rajan is affectionately called, is a wannabe stand up comedian. He has a funny take on most things but documents only some of them. If you are interested in chatting up with him, do drop him an email at jv.rajan@gmail.com or message him at +919650080255.

2 replies on “Getting drugged slowly but steadily”

u know – i was really using this for my daily dose of humor ( i start the day with my computer)
of late even before i access ur site i start dreading what if there is another one
and when i access it i feel, oh! no there is another one
do u have to say something …… even in topics like increase in drug costs
seriously sila naeram erichal varudhu – the humor is really lost
u could do better
too much of a thing is………………..
i really want to start my day with my dosage of humor and not with disappointment – please don’t limit urself with such things.

but I again liked the post.. yes, it is not superlative good… but then, who can manage to do that.. days after days, months after months, years after years.. dhoni can not hit every ball to six, sachin can not make century in every match… jammy can not produce masterpiece every single time.. let’s realise this. I have problems only when I see no new post… and most of the time I don’t have…

and guess what.. it comes for free.. who said “in life, there are no free lunches”

with high regards to all fellows..

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