Conversations by Dr Manmohan Singh, Prime Minister of India

Dr Manmohan Singh and I go a long way. If Dr Manmohan Singh hadn`t been named Asia`s best Finance Minister in 1993 (wasn`t it that year?), I wouldn`t have wanted to become a Finance Minister and joined BA Economics at The American College, Madurai. Thanks to him, I had joined the only course in the college which the pretty girls hated. I will never forgive Dr Manmohan Singh for what he did to me – my experience studying BA Economics was so bad that that till date it remains my only exposure to college. By the time I was out (in 1998 A.D.) I had started believing in self-education.

SMS Conversations
SMS Conversations

In this post, I try and imagine the various SMS conversations that Dr Manmohan Singh would be having with his friends & colleagues. If you haven`t guessed it yet, this is my revenge on India`s Prime Minister Dr Manmohan Singh for stealing my childhood away from me.

Here is a SMS conversation that happened between Dr Manmohan Singh and the Head of Black Cats Security the moment Dr Manmohan Singh assumed office and moved into his official 7, Race Course Road residence…..

Dr Manmohan Singh: Guess, where I am?

Head of Black Cats: The Discussion Room

Dr Manmohan Singh: Now?

Head of Black Cats: In the Meeting Room

Dr Manmohan Singh: Tell me where am I now?

Head of Black Cats: The Nuclear room.

Dr Manmohan Singh: My God. So, it is true. You guys are good. OK now?

Head of Black Cats: The 3rd closet in women`s toilet. And can we get over this game please?

Dr Manmohan Singh: Sure. Sorry.

————-X—————
Here is a SMS conversation that happened between Dr Manmohan Singh and his longtime friend Balwinder Singh immediately after he moved into his official residence at 7, Race Course Road.

Dr Manmohan Singh: Now, you can drop in home for a drink.

Balwinder Singh: Isn`t your wife home?

Dr Manmohan Singh: Too many rooms. Earlier house had only 3, so she could find us. Besides, no need to ask her for money to buy the drinks – I have my own personal wine cellar in the basement.

Balwinder Singh: And you don`t have to pay?

Dr Manmohan Singh: I hope so. I will check with Vajpayee if he was asked to pay the bills when he checked out after five years.

Balwinder Singh: Yeah. It happened with me in South Africa, when I went for that Economists` Seminar. I had to pay the hotel while checking out.

Dr Manmohan Singh: Calling Vajpayee now. Hope he picks up…for all that we did to him.

————-X—————

Here is a SMS conversation that happened between Dr Dr Manmohan Singh and his girl friend after he became the Prime Minister.

Dr Manmohan Singh: FYI. My mobile SMSes are being tracked, so let us not discuss economics on this phone.

So-and-so Kaur: When did we ever discuss Economics? Are you crazy?

Dr Manmohan Singh: If Adam Smith, the Father of Economics equals Cupid, then Economics equals? Don`t answer that, just FYI.

So-and-so Kaur: What has happened to you? You have changed after you have become the Prime Minister. And I was thinking, you won`t.

Dr Manmohan Singh: I haven`t changed. I am surrounded by people now – people of all kinds. I hope you understand. Give me some time.

So-and-so Kaur: I supported you when they spoke of you and Sonia. Is she the ‘kind people` you are talking about? What is it about her that I don`t have?

Dr Manmohan Singh: You don`t understand “Economics”.

————-X—————

Here is a SMS conversation that happened between Dr Dr Manmohan Singh and his Chief of Security staff six months after Dr Dr Manmohan Singh became the Prime Minister.

Dr Manmohan Singh: What about China dude?

Chief of Security Staff: What about China?

Dr Manmohan Singh: I was briefed they are lining up their troops across the border.

Chief of Security Staff: That`s been happening since 1962, and 25 Chief of Staffs and fourteen Prime Ministers have changed watching them line up their troops on the border.

Dr Manmohan Singh: I shouldn`t be worried?

Chief of Security Staff: Nope. By the way, they are showing Kabhi Khushi Kabhie Gham on Sony TV.

Dr Manmohan Singh: I was watching ‘The Great Escape` on HBO. Checking Sony now.

————-X—————

Here is a SMS conversation that happened between Dr Dr Manmohan Singh and Sonia Gandhi one year after Dr Manmohan Singh became the Prime Minister.

Dr Manmohan Singh: Sorry, couldn`t hold it any longer. You look good in a saree.

Sonia Gandhi: This is Rahul Gandhi. Please keep your dirty hands to yourself. Stay away from my mother. Or else….

Dr Manmohan Singh: Oops! Wrong number.

————-X—————

Here is a SMS conversation that happened between Dr Dr Manmohan Singh and the actual Sonia Gandhi three months after the earlier incident with Rahul Gandhi.

Dr Manmohan Singh: Is this Sonia Gandhi?

Sonia Gandhi: Yes Manmohan.

Dr Manmohan Singh: Are you sure you are NOT Rahul or Priyanka?

Sonia Gandhi: Yes I am sure. What is it Manmohan?

Dr Manmohan Singh: I can`t hold it any longer. You look good in a saree.

Sonia Gandhi: What? Why do you say so?

Dr Manmohan Singh: Just felt like. Nothing else.

Sonia Gandhi: Manmohan, I look at you like my brother. We have such a platonic relationship…why do you want to spoil it?

Dr Manmohan Singh: Brother?

Sonia Gandhi: Second only to Amar Singh, but brother all the same.

Dr Manmohan Singh: Would you have Maneka`s number with you?

————-X—————

Here is a SMS conversation that happened between Dr Dr Manmohan Singh and his father two years after Dr Manmohan Singh was sworn in as the Prime Minister.

Dr Manmohan Singh`s father: Congrats son.

Dr Manmohan Singh: Thanks father. Even I didn`t expect to
stay this long. Being married to Gursharan Kaur really helped matters.

Dr Manmohan Singh`s father: Yeah. Submission runs in the family, and we have only gained from it.

Dr Manmohan Singh: I guess so.

Dr Manmohan Singh`s father: I met your class teacher yesterday and he still doesn`t believe that you are the country`s Prime Minister.

Dr Manmohan Singh: What does he say?

Dr Manmohan Singh`s father: He says the joke has gone too far.

Note 1: The first SMS conversation is inspired from one of the Obama jokes I had read on internet. Don`t remember the source.
Note 2: If you can think of any other people with whom Dr Manmohan Singh could have had an SMS conversation, please do leave a comment and I just might be able to update this post with more conversations.
Note 3: Thanks Nil Thinker, have corrected Manmohan’s residence post your comment

By Jamshed V Rajan

Jammy, as Jamshed V Rajan is affectionately called, is a wannabe stand up comedian. He has a funny take on most things but documents only some of them. If you are interested in chatting up with him, do drop him an email at jv.rajan@gmail.com or message him at +919650080255.

19 replies on “Conversations by Dr Manmohan Singh, Prime Minister of India”

Manmohan shifted to Rashtrapati Bhavan!!! What? When? How? Is there a confusion here? Are you predicting the future when he becomes the President? Currently, the PM’s residence, 7 Race Course Road is good for him…
BTW, u can add a conversation between him and the President Pratibha Patil, who actually lives in the Rashtrapati Bhavan.

I was sure to see the post ending with PM’s SMS exchange with JV Rajan, whom you would know as yourself.. So that would be my update to this post!

PM: I see that I had effectively ruined your chances of meeting a pretty girl during college years (no offence to Rekha, but this is the PM speaking not me!)

JV: I guess I have to forgive you now that you are the PM of my country. And then again, you have effectively ruined a lot of chance like that in Naxal belt.

PM: Come on now, I did a lot of good for this country when I was the FM of the country, you got to cut me slack.

JV: When you were FM it was FM(‘)S work (False Memory Syndrome) and that could be good, but I don’t remember.. Now you are PM and it is PM(‘)S work and that we know it is never good!

(Yeah, I know Jammy, that you could do a lot of improvisations on this one!)

Jammy, just a thought, an SMS conversation with Pakistani counterpart could also work out well maybe.

“You don’t understand “Economics”.”.. I pity him in that situation.. how about a sms conversation between him and the head of maids at the PM’s residence.. that should be fun.. :p

wow jammy u rock 🙂
but it should definitely have a conversation between manmohan and future Star Jammy 🙂

I was Expecting one between Americas President “Mr. Obama” and Dr. Manmohan Singh.

or

With Americas Ex-President “Mr. Clinton” in reference to Monika lewinsky

When Congress won the elections under Sonia’s leadership, she scored some brownie points by saying she will not take the PMs seat. So she called for interviews from eligible congress politicians from within the party.Here’s part of that interview transcript that won him the PMs job
Sonia: Where were you born?
MMS: Thiruvanathapuram
Sonia:Spell it
MMS:I was kidding, actually I was born in Goa.

I really learned something very innovative and i personally think that it was not possible to learn this kind of living fact from any where else. In your each and every posted articles, i found something new to learn but among the best tactic was to give our failure credit to someone else.

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