Rekha and I differ in our opinion

Rekha and I have started differing in our opinion. Not that we did not differ earlier. Now we differ more often.

Our first difference of opinion was when we ended up loving different people. Eventually, we got married to different people. She married me and I married her. Not a good thing to start a relationship with.

(The following line has been inspired by a T-shirt)

We also differ on religious note. I think I am God and she thinks I am not.

On the political front, she is all red. No, she doesn`t blush when we talk of politics…I meant that she is communist. No wonder, all this while she also expected me to chip in with household work. I am more of a congressman. Been like that ever since I fell in love with Priyanka Gandhi. It is another story that Robert Wadhera piped me to the post. Guess, his height helped him clinch the deal.

On the geographical front, we are tied between Kerala and Tamil Nadu. When she talks of the high literacy rates in Kerala, I talk of the high per-capita income of Tamil Nadu…and when she talks of Mamooty..I refer to Rajinikanth. If we were to take a movie on our discussions on movies from the two states…we would probably win the National Award for dialogue.

On the sociology front, I have a generous lead. She believes high population is the reason why India is today a super power. I say if India were not as populated…we would have been a super power by now. Sticking to her stand, she says she wants to have four kids…two boys and two girls (and both twins). Where would I go for such a combination? Wonder if I can download them from the internet. If you ask me, I am fine with one kid…and that too before the Family Planning department of India change the slogan to “Three is a Crowd” from the existing…”We are two…we need only one”.

On the Economical front, she takes a lead by far. Any amount of persuasion…not to mention my BA in Economics…doesn`t seem to hold water with my wife. She runs the show. I have to resort to shop-lifting to cater to my daily needs. Last week, I even got caught…but when I narrated my tale of woe…the shop-keeper relented. He understood. Looks like he has a wife.

Even one hour back we had a small fight….she said “I love you.” And I said…”But I don`t love me. I love you.”

We are yet to call each other and patch up.

By Jamshed V Rajan

Jammy, as Jamshed V Rajan is affectionately called, is a wannabe stand up comedian. He has a funny take on most things but documents only some of them. If you are interested in chatting up with him, do drop him an email at jv.rajan@gmail.com or message him at +919650080255.

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