The 21st century woman

My father always wanted me to marry a lady army officer. He started nursing this wish after I failed the National Defense Academy exam, Combined Defense Services exam and the Armed Forces Medical College exam, in that order.

With my job here in Sify taking me no closer to an Army officer, leave alone a lady officer, my father was forced to redefine his preferences. Now, he wants a 21st century woman.

And who is she? Let us have a looksie –

She is the one who goes to the moon as an astronaut, yet is at loggerheads in the house, failing to understand how a DVD player needs to be operated. The same woman can go to combat wearing the fatigues, but lets out a shriek on seeing a cockroach.

The same woman, who cannot read a map and changes her mind every second. The same woman, who has no addictions – except for lipsticks, shoes, nail-polish and hand bags.

The same woman who claims to hate lies, demanding that I should never lie to her…yet when my moment of triumph comes, fakes an orgasm.

The woman who chooses her own man. The woman who insists she is no hooker hence be treated with respect. That is, till I have bought her dinner.

Papa, you lived in a better World. Pity my son, though.

Dear ladies, my apologies if I have hurt your feelings. And if you think you are a lady, and yet are not like what I have written, check again. If doubts persist, see a qualified doctor.

By Jamshed V Rajan

Jammy, as Jamshed V Rajan is affectionately called, is a wannabe stand up comedian. He has a funny take on most things but documents only some of them. If you are interested in chatting up with him, do drop him an email at jv.rajan@gmail.com or message him at +919650080255.

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