I think I am a Casanova
I think I am real cool Casanova. I have at least 5-6 pretty girls calling me every week. Shhhh….Rekha doesn’t know. This will be our little secret.
These girls are pretty and are gifted with sweet, seductive voice. Actually, let me be open with you. I don’t know if these girls are pretty, but they do sound pretty pretty. Not that it matters, but in terms of setting a man’s World right… visual aid is second only to humanitarian aid.
These girls would call me almost every day and ask if I was ready. That is, if I was ready to use their services. When they say services, they meant nothing but credit cards. And I am sure your slimy, corrupted mind would have imagined a hundred naughty things.
Here is how I spoke to the first lady who was trying to sell me a credit card –
(This was four years back, and I was new to Chennai. I was a rookie in the world of conmen, bluff, cheats, criminals, double-crossers, dupes, frauds, grafters and swindlers.)
She: Hi, am I speaking to Mr Jamshed V Rajan?
Me: Yes, please.
She: Sir, I am calling from ICICI Credit cards, and we have this no-yearly-fee offer for Sify Employees.
Me: Credit cards? Hm….
(I was in a state of shock. I never believed I would one day own a credit card. I thought it was for the cool guys..and I was nowhere close).
She: Sir, this offer is valid only till this month end. And I would suggest you go for it right away.
(She addressing me as ‘Sir’ in every sentence was getting to my head. I don’t get addressed by that title every day)
Me: That was so nice of you to take the trouble to inform me about this offer. What favour can I do for you in return?
She: Nothing sir, this is plain social work.
(She would then ask me my Cost To The Company (Salary) and how many years I had put in with Sify etc)
She: Sir, We can offer you a Gold card. Also, if you have a picture of yours …we could use it on the credit card. (on the right you see the pic, I sent)
Me: That would be great. I really like you. Thanks a lot for doing so much for me. Perhaps, we could meet somewhere and get to know each other better.
(I was under the impression that she was doing all this for me because she was in love with me and wanted to impress me. I asked her out because I thought it was a man’s responsibility)
She: Sir, we could meet after you get the Gold card.
Me: Sure we can. And could I ask you a favor …please, don’t address me as ‘Sir.’
She: Sure Rajan. So I will send one of my executives with the application form.
In a day’s time an executive from the Bank came and in a few days time, I would get my first Credit card.
My dream girl never called after that. I tried calling the number from where she had called me, but a giggling girl would tell me that Radhika (that was her name) had quit her job.
As days went by and I recovered from a bout of Devdas-sickness, I started going to office. Almost immediately, I started getting many more such calls from ‘pretty’ girls and soon I forgot my heartthrob Radhika.
While I felt happy that so many girls were taking interest in me…to this day…I fail to understand why they all shy away from meeting me!
Related posts You might want to read:
- Ten reasons why you need a girl friend…
To show-off I know most of you men out there will agree that girl friends are a little difficult to walk with. I am not referring to their slow gait in tight trousers ..but figuratively. Not many of us actually like to walk on a busy road with a girl friend in tow? But we [...]... - Happy New Year
As my daughter in the picture says, if you have been reading Ouchmytoe, we guarantee a Happy New Year and not just wish you. That’s why I thought we needed an article on ‘Happy New Year’ was/is/will be celebrated. Rekha and I had celebrated 2006’s New Year’s Eve by venturing out in the dark (an [...]... - Encounters of the third kind
Three days back I met a girl in Gurgaon. Needless to say, she was pretty. I was smitten by her the moment I saw her – probably because I had spent six years in Chennai and was longing for somebody fair. If you are a Chennai woman you will have to excuse me…I am only [...]... - How to get into a conversation with a girl
If you know the girl’s mobile number, getting into a conversation with her is easy. Just dial her number, tell her that you can calling in from the ICICI Bank’s credit card division and want to tell her about an interesting Gold card offer. If she buys your story she probably is dumb enough to [...]... - Sonia and Manmohan caught on tape
Inspired by this guy at http://bigshakes.rediffblogs.com Here is the transcript of a discussion between Sonia Gandhi and Manmohan Singh, just before the Italian lady decided not to become the Prime Minister. SONIA: Praji, do you think I should become the first foreign Prime Minister of India? MANMOHAN: Not necessarily. SONIA: You suggesting that I should [...]... - Golden rule of marriage remains unbroken
This Friday Rekha read my blog after a long time and as expected wasn’t impressed with the way I had been projecting her to the World. After leaving damaging comments (which I have deleted now) she decided to call me at office. “I would like to discuss our marriage with you,” Rekha roared into the [...]... - Email exchanges between five consenting, cheating adults
This blog post has been inspired by a book called ‘E’ written by Matt Beaumont, a talented writer. The book is set in an Ad Agency called Miller Shanks in London and is written as a series of mails. Just mails exchanged between the colleagues and nothing else. So, here is my attempt in copying [...]... - Running away from noodles
It was pure love. And of course some lust. She was pretty and this explained my affection for her.... - Check-mate over the phone
I was innocent. For I thought she loved me. I was obviously (and naturally) thinking like a man. Rekha used to call me at least four to five times during office hours. If I include calls made to remind me to pay the phone bill, drop the Credit card cheque, or book train tickets…it would [...]... - Happy Valentine’s day, dear teacher
Ouchmytoe.com has seen two Valentine Day’s posts in its lifetime. Way back in 2004, I was looking for St Valentine and in 2006 I tried making it a special day for my newly wedded wife, Rekha. Today, almost five years (or is it six?) after our marriage I suddenly feel like writing about Valentine’s Day [...]...
Print this post
| Email this post
| 700 views








I love your blog ! It is hilarious and so true !