My adventures – Chennai to Gurgaon
Finally! This post is to announce my arrival in Gurgaon. The city is all gur and no gaon.
At about 9.15 a.m. on June 25, the pilot of the 6.15 a.m. Kingfisher Airlines from Chennai announced: “We will be reaching Delhi in the next ten minutes. The climatic temperature in the Indian capital is 30 degree Celsius at the moment, and the political temperature is close to 100 degree Celsius.”
I stayed in my seat …the passengers who had to get down at Delhi started getting ready. One of them changed from his lungi into a three-piece suit, while the other removed the saree-cradle she had tied from the roof of the airplane for her baby.
Since I wasn’t getting down in Delhi, I didn’t even wear my shoes. Whenever on a plane, I make it a point of removing my shoes and showing my socks to the fellow passengers. This way, nobody blames me for the foul smell which unfortunately follows me all around.
Just to be sure I dug into my experience of traveling in buses and nudged my co-passenger (who was checking morphed Madhuri Dixit’s pictures in his Blackberry) and asked: ‘This airplane would go to Gurgaon, right? Is that the last stop?”
“I am sorry. This is a Chennai-Delhi flight.” Madhuri Dixit’s pictures must have been real good, for the man got back to his Blackberry.
I wanted to argue with the man, but somehow Madhuri Dixit’s morphed pictures caught my eye and I lost track of time. Don’t get me wrong…the Photoshop expert had only morphed Madhuri Dixit as Jhansi Ki Rani. Or was that Shantoshi Ma?
Suddenly somebody shouted: “Did you just fart?” The question was loud and heard all over the airplane. Six of the passengers shouted back in indignation: “It wasn’t me this time!”
Thankfully, we all heard the pilot say to his co-pilot, “Shucks, the mike is still on,” before the line went dead. I say thankfully, because the passengers had started blaming each other and some were even asking for proof of being non-guilty.
Unlike his mouth, the pilot had better control over his hands – it was one of the best landings I had experienced.
All the passengers bound for Delhi stood up….and started walking slowly. I fail to why the inside of an airplane turns into a metropolitan bus as soon as it stops.
Soon enough, everybody got down.
Suddenly I was feeling lonely. I always feel so when I am the last passenger and I have to get down at the terminus. Just that, in a bus the home stretch is spent with the conductor and here I had two pretty kingfisher air hostesses for company.
Luck of all lucks….one of them was now looking at me…and smiling…and walking towards me. Was she going to take advantage of me? Was the second air hostess also going to join in? What will they force me to do? Will they video-tape me and then force me to visit their home whenever they wanted? Will the video be uploaded on Youtube under the title ‘IT professional molested by two air hostesses’? How will the media respond when I call in a press conference to say these girls were tormenting me? Will the judge believe me when I describe how they removed my shirt? Will Rekha trust me from now onwards? The questions were plenty…but there was no time for answers…for she was now very near.
“Sir, you will have to get down. We are in Delhi.” For somebody so besotted by my looks she had tremendous self control. Surprisingly, she was controlling her feelings pretty well.
“But I am going to Gurgaon. That’s where MIH Internet’s office is…and I am joining them as a Sr Product Manager.” I managed an emphasis on the word ‘senior’ to impress her.
“Sir, Gurgaon doesn’t have an airport. You will have to take a cab from here. Can you please get off this plane?”
I didn’t understand why the air hostess was behaving like this. Till only sometime back, she seemed to want to hug me…and now she wanted me off the plane.
I knew the first air hostess will catch up with me and give me her number. While passing the third row of seats…I realized she was much smarter than I had thought she was…she had left a tissue paper with a message for me on the floor. I slowly picked it up – lest the second air hostess saw it. As the girl in love had suggested I took the cab and was on my way to Gurgaon.
Yaaaahoooo! Looks like I made a good decision…for MIH Internet seems to be a company that takes good care of its employees – they have provided me guest house accommodation, a car and a driver for the first 15 days of my stay in Gurgaon.
PS: Don’t know whose phlegm the tissue paper contained.
Other Flighty Reads
# Difference between a train & an aeroplane – a guide for the first time flyer
# The Kingfisher Class – Part 1
# The Kingfisher Class – Part 2
# Traveling by Kingfisher Airlines
# Inside the Jet Airways flight
# Reporting straight from the Bangalore Airport
# Cheap airlines and cheap thrills
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Posted by Jamshed V Rajan
on Jun 27 2007. Filed under Flirting, Life in North India, Men, Office.
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lame!
Thankfully, we all heard the pilot say to his co-pilot, “Shucks, the mike is still on,” before the line went dead.
Never thought about that.. it was great. liked it.. hope the goan gives youa sehari welcome!!!
“and the political temperature is close to 100 degree Celsius.” HAHAHAHAHHA
it was a gaon earlier now turned to IT/BPO center … welcum to north, i wonder what yr daughter will think when she reads this stuffs when she grows up…
Hey! Jammy, Good to know that ur in Gurgaon…. are u in the guesthouse now? How’s MIH? and any outings in Gurgaon that you went. The only iota of civilisation are the malls next to the guesdthouse where you are staying
. But otherwise, I liked the company and delhi in general, but gurgaon is pretty much another Hosur road, with garbage and sunglassed buildings shaking hands.
Good luck in Gurgaon ! You need pots of that man !
thanks for making me laugh this morning
A very cooooooooooooooooooooollllllllll post after a looooooooooooongggggggg time! Had a great laugh!
Unlike his mouth, the pilot had better control over his hands.
Was it the mouth you meant?
Hilarious!!
I’m in gurgaon from past 3 months and trust me, it was hot and humid like hell. But its raining today!! Maybe your good luck followed you.
One of my friends is an Air Hostess with Kingfisher, lemmi forwarrd this link to her and see how she reacts..I’m sure its going to be fun!!! lolzzz
have a nice stay and keep posting!
managed to land here after a long gap, after company blocked access. and what a great post. made my day..
i am in faridabad, stone\’s away from gurgaon, i.e. if you can throw it 30 kms.
Hopefully yr sense of humor will improve there..
Yasou Jammy…
Wish you all the best in Gurgaon…
Hope that the new city will give you more ideas and we can get more and more posts about the city… like the difference in bus journeys in chennai and Gurgaon etc…..
hi jammy
So u are stickin to Kingfisher, eh? Nothin to do with airhostesses i guess:-))
Tissue paper was such a letdown eh ?
Best of luck in Gurgaon. My gutfeel is that u may not like the place too much ..However, ur new job should compensate. Movies and malls are the only things in Gurgaon. And you HAVE to have a car; or u are like handicapped there…I was ther for 3 weeks and wanted to runaway asap ….Hope u hav some frnds there- else its real boring too. Of course u can drive to delhi as there’re a lot of things there.
Very hilarious!
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