I am looking for a ‘birthday’ partner

Twenty sixth of April is my birthday and I will be alone in Gurgaon. My wife and daughter are in Kerala celebrating Vishu (the New Year in Kerala) and my only girl friend will be out of town. Since I didn`t want to spend my birthday alone & drinking, I asked my good friend Rahul Razdan: “Rahul, would it be a good idea to sell six hours of my time on my birth day on eBay?”

“What would you do and who would bid for your offer?” He was straight to the point.

“I am supposed to be a humor blogger. There has to be somebody who will be willing to pay at least 1 dollar to spend six hours with me,” I insisted.

“What if nobody wanted to spend time with you on your birthday? Wouldn`t you be depressed further?”

“I would create another eBay ID and bid for my own time. Then, me and my split-personality will dine together,” I said with a chuckle. But deep down, I was a little happy I didn`t post it on eBay.

Why leave familiar territory? So, here is an offer:

If you stay somewhere close by, and don`t mind spending time with a guy who can at least try to make you laugh…why don`t we meet up on 26th April, 2009? I promise to learn some new jokes & practice hard.

Since it is my birthday it is only natural that I bear all expenses as part of the treat. If you are interested, please mail me at jv.rajan@gmail.com with/without your contact number so that I can get in touch with you. You can also leave a comment with your email ID (and nobody besides me can see your mail ID). Alternatively, you can call me on 09971996581.

Disclaimer: If you aren`t in Gurgaon/Delhi and would like to fly in from some other city/country…let me tell you that that I can`t afford your air tickets. Would loveeeee the gesture, though.

Links to help you decide:

A funny take on myself | My Professional Profile | Googling my name gets you these results

Answering some doubts you might have…

**Obviously, gender is no bar
**I will let you know by Saturday morning (25th April) if we are going to have lunch together. The idea is to give you enough time.
**We will meet for lunch, perhaps. And extend it to dinner – you being the guest, you will get to decide if you want the dinner with me or not
**I stay in Gurgaon, so any place in Delhi, Gurgaon or Noida is fine with me (I am the typical male that doesn’t ask for directions!)
**We can also squeeze in a drive to some place or a movie together (up to you)
**I drink. But only if you decide to stay back for dinner. I never drink when there is light (what of somebody sees me?!)

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50 thoughts on “I am looking for a ‘birthday’ partner

  1. I wish i can stay for dinner too but I might have to retrn. Which Restaurant will you take me to? I am a vege and stay in Delhi. In Delhi pls

  2. Hi,

    came over from Kavi’s blog and landed bang in the middle of your exotic appeal….I’m from Mumbai, and so will you please please please treat me with authentic Lucknowi biriyani (you can have curd rice, no probs, I’ll hog the biriyani) if you and i hit it off on your birthday???

    I’m a Bengali stranded in Mumbai for the past few years, and I’m dying to have biriyani the way they make it in Delhi (and Kolkata, of course).

    If you won’t give me the treat, NO GO, but HAPPY BIRTHDAY anyway, and do keep making us laugh….

  3. Isn’t that Paresh raval in sun goggles?
    Anyhow, nice idea. 🙂 But what will you do if more than one person likes to dine with you and they all won’t concur on where?
    Here’s an Idea: Lock them at your home and have them eat curdrice with pickle south indian style.

    Oh! and BTW, I fall into the gesturing from faraway (Vijayawada) people.

  4. hey u know what?its my bday too!!how i wish i cud spend it with sm1 who shared the same birth day!:)that way i cud save u half the expense as it wud b my treat too!!:)

  5. My alter-ego insists I spend time with you on your birthday, but my feminine ego just refuses to tell a guy she’d like to spend time with him, especially because she thinks he is so funny. 🙂

  6. @ Sucharita Sarkar: I have heard of Lucknowi biriyani too…never had though. But don’t they have good biriyani in Mumbai? I would be damned if they didn’t for I thought Mumbai had the best eat-out culture (Next only to Delhi!).

    I doubt if in these recession times you would make a trip to Delhi, just for lunch…so lets try and meet up when either of us cross states. What say?

  7. @ Ashmita: You in US right? Saw it on your Orkut profile when you blurbed last. The best we could have is perhaps a cake cutting ceremony on Skype. Let me know…will then have to buy a webcam. 😉

    **I could just have a picture of cake in front of the webcam and you won’t even know.

  8. @ Subhash Chandra: Paresh Rawal…I love that guy. regarding your question on what if more people want to dine with me and they cant concur on the place…let me assure you that wont happen.

    I would be lucky to walk away with one person willing and from my city. Locking them up in my house? No way sire…what if they eat up my sofa?

  9. @ KoolRaaga: Thanksmate. Siesta? You mean you want to sleep in the afternoon, with me? Quite a tempting offer…just that I am straight. Beer…yes dude…anytime. Where do you stay?

  10. @ Leela: Wow…a doctor for company. Are you the Medical kind of doctor or the PHD kind of Doctor? Was planning to visit a doc tomorrow but if I am going to meet you anyway, I could always save the consultation fee.
    Would love to have a “Doctor” birthday partner…call me pls. if I can’t pick up…will call you back.

  11. @Valia: You could just send your alter-ego. Just dress her up properly and I wouldn’t even spot the difference.

    yeah…to spend time with a guy just because he is funny, is like placing a pebble on your cheeks because it is cool. Don’t get the connection? neither did i!

  12. Unfortunately in the US and no, I can’t afford to fly down for your birthday even though it is such a momentous occasion 😛
    Happy birthday to you and hope you have many many people to share your birthday with!
    ….honestly though, what happened to your own friends?!!

  13. Hey Jammy, hate to break it to you but Vishu is over. I think your wifey just wanted to avoid being there for your bday. Sorry dear, but someone had to break it to you.

    But, I think we can meet, have a great lunch, dinner and whatever else your cute little credit card can muster. My husband and kids were all excited when they found out about your “all expense paid” offer. Let me know! 🙂

  14. Jammy- I got the connection

    to spend time with a guy just because he is funny, is like placing a pebble on your cheeks because it is cool.

    subjects in comparison (guy) & (pebble)….eqn1

    analogical adjective (funny) & (cool)……eqn2

    verb in usage (spend time) & (placing)…eqn3

    In eqn 1 we can prove that guys are like pebbles, strong and will go with the flow. Have you ever seen a pebble asking for directions? It just follows the current.

    eqn 2: The adjective funny has one meaning: funny. The adjective cool has more than one meaning.
    In this context we can assume 2 of these meaning
    a. cool= awesome/sweet etc
    b. cool=cold to touch

    since in co-relation with eqn 1 meaning (a) is similar and more aplicable to eqn 2, we assume that guys have to be cool and funny to spend time with

    eqn 3. To spend time with a person, one must find an appropriate place…eqn 4
    The art of finding an appropriate place is called placing…eqn 5

    adding eqns 4 & 5 …. “finding appropriate place gets cancelled” therefore to spend time with a person is called placing.

    Therefore summarising these three equations we see the relations between placing the pebble on cheek, with spending time with a guy because he is funny.

    Disclaimer: derived using the laws of the subject of reading between the lines

  15. Hi Jammy
    Happy birthday,our mrg anniversary falls on the same day otherwise I cud hav wishd u at ur place wid a biiiiiiiiiig cake 🙂

  16. Jammy,

    Came over from Kavi’s.

    A bunch of us in Mumbai,(n = 5) incl Kavi and Sucharita (of the Lucknow biryani) are having a bloggers lunch at a Sizzlers place on Saturday 25th. Please join us , and we will all sing a great bday song for you, cake and all. Except we dont throw them. Just hog.

    And just in case , we have folks coming over from Pune too….

  17. Jammy, am hoping that you had a great day. And will you please put the experience here on the blog please? 😀
    Next time, I swear I will have you post my birthday invite on your blog – maybe half the women who responded to your birthday bash invitation might agree to come to my birthday celebration too. Well, your blog is famous – we all know and so, it’ll be the marketing launch platform! 😛

    Happy Birthday again.

  18. Darn it.. was hoping i could fly down to delhi at this chance…!!

    i know of 3others who celebrate their bday on the same day as yours!! 😀

    have a fun day…

  19. @ Roshni: Thanks mate. Yeah and I am also hoping to have many many friends to share my birthday with.

    My friends? Wouldn’t it be boring to celebrate my birthday year-on-year with the same set of people? A little adventure doesn’t hurt you know

  20. @ Ammu: Ohh yeah…I know Vishu is over. I found this sentence “Sorry dear, but someone had to break it to you” pretty cute.

    My wifey isn’t avoiding me…she just extended her Vishu break and is with her parents.

    And hey, my cute little credit card is all set. Plus I love kids (at least I used to be a good kids person ten years ago…today’s kids will make a fool of me and walk away!!). So, how do we take this forward?

  21. @sunehri: Well, Happy Marriage Anniversary!! And I hope your hubby remembers it and is considering this as an occasion to celebrate. Just ensure he doesn’t walk into the house that day with a black arm band around his arms…like the cricketers!

    And hey, thanks for the biiiiiiiiig cake!

  22. @ugich konitari: YOu saying as if “Kavi’s” is like Tendulkar’s (remember the restaurant?)

    Would have loved to join you guys, but i am in Delhi/Gurgaon. Plus I have a handicap…I can’t walk into any Sizzlers place. Ask me why?…..because…two sizzlers in the same place? No sire….

  23. @puneet: Thats the whole bloddy problem na mate. Look closely at my problem now:

    If I say I was mobbed, the readers will think ‘what an ass. Show off.” and stop reading the blog.

    If I say: “I didnt even get a birthday partner, they will think ‘and i thought he was good’ and stop reading the blog.

    All in all, this exercise is gonna hurt

  24. Thanks Jamshed for suggesting a title for my blog. The day i decide to share my conspiracies, I will change the title to “Shazia ki Saazish”. 🙂
    And thanks for visiting my blog and appreciating it. You know I had been writing quite frequently till a month back. But now I am working on my PhD thesis and it is taking most of time. And also i have discovered what an awful “scientific writer” I am. 🙁
    Anyways, will call and wish you tomorrow. Have a nice time on your birthday!

  25. Beleted birthday wishes Jammy

    My wife shares her birthday with you. I would have let her celebrate with you with only one condition…not to send her back to me 😉 Its too late now 🙁 Next year may be

  26. My Bday was on 7th.
    I wonder ultimately how many girls you ended up having lunch and/ or dinner with and whether you people came into a consensus regarding a common place.
    Happy belated Bday.
    Hello? Hope you are still there with your funny bone intact…..? 😉

    Cheers!
    ~uh~

  27. Hey Jammy… Belated Birthday wishes… Hope you had a fabulous day.. So, how many b’day partners were you mobbed with? 🙂 I have not been frequent on the net for more than 2 months now… Was blessed with a baby girl (my first one) on 25 April…hence missed reading your blogs… So, my girl’s bday will be a day before yours 😉 Just back at work and decided to check on what’s been happening at ouchmytoe.com. So, is Rekha and the baby back? Take care and keep writing!! God bless.. Rincy

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