How life style changes after heavy rains

I didn`t believe when it happened in Mumbai. I didn`t believe when it happened in Gujarat. Now, that it has happened in Chennai and I have experienced it, I believe in life after rains a la life after death.

The last few days have seen unprecedented rains in Chennai. Unprecedented is the wrong word but I am using it because when it rained in my city last, my grand pa was in my great-grand ma`s womb.

Like I was saying, Chennai has got 30 centimeters of rain in the last two days. Some say it is low pressure over the Bay of Bengal which has resulted in the rain. The more intelligent – like the weathermen – say “Though our records show that the best days for a downpour are Mondays, Tuesdays, Wednesdays, Thursdays, Fridays, Saturdays and Sundays…God only knows from where these rains came.”

I say my life has changed because now I can`t get out of my house without becoming a canvas for all those artistic Chennai residents. Last evening, a speeding car splashed a Picasso like free-wheeling art on my white shirt. Before I could thank the car driver, he sped away.

Even as I surveyed the free-wheeling art all over me, I realized I was not alone. There was competition – almost everybody in Chennai was turning into an artist. Well, if not the artist, at least the canvas. Copy cats, I tell you.

A dejected me walked up to the autorickshaw driver and asked: “Sir, can you drop me at my office – Satyam City Center – in Sholinganallur.”

“What can you give me in return?” The driver seemed a hard bargainer.

“You tell me. You definitely know the market better.” The first lesson in negotiation is, β€˜never quote first`. What if you quote first and undercut yourself?

 “Rs 100?”

“No. I will settle for your washing machine.”

I was shocked. “Are you charging me my washing machine for a trip that would otherwise have cost me Rs 50?” I asked.

“Yes!” The driver knew he had the upper hand.

The sarcastic me took over and I said: “Why don`t you take my refrigerator? I bought it only recently, and anyway it costs more than the washing machine.”

The auto driver said: “That`s fine sir. I already got a refrigerator from the earlier customer.”

I decided to walk down the wild side. When I am angry, I can really walk a long distances. The other day I was angry with Rekha and walked all the way to our mailbox to pickup our mail.

As I was saying, I rolled up my sleeves…only to realize that rolling up ones sleeves during rains is of no use….rolled them down again…and rolled up my trousers …and started walking. After three hours I reached office. The mood was upbeat.

I saw Rosy the pretty girl staring at her computer. “What happened?” I asked her.

“I had to sell my jewellery to reach office.” She seemed pretty dejected. The good Samaritan in me tried to cheer her up but it didn`t work.

As a last resort, I said: “At least, you have a nice home to go back to. Think of all those homeless people suffering in the rains.”

“Ohh…I forgot to tell you, while I sold my jewellery to reach office my husband sold our house!”

Other Wet Reads

Traveling – the things we will miss in future
When it rained heavily in Chennai
My world is suddenly crowded

By Jamshed V Rajan

Jammy, as Jamshed V Rajan is affectionately called, is a wannabe stand up comedian. He has a funny take on most things but documents only some of them. If you are interested in chatting up with him, do drop him an email at or message him at +919650080255.

14 replies on “How life style changes after heavy rains”

these auto-wallahs I tell you…having a diwali bonus….The Hindu has an article in today’s newspaper….
the auto drivers in Blr are no less …I was tired of fighting/bargaining with them….

Ohh Marooing Line on Rosy….Jammy Ab Toh Sudhar Jaao πŸ˜›

You always merge a moral with all your phunny posts…..yeah think of the homeless suffering in the rains…

Maybe everyone in Chennai will wish
Rain Rain go away
Come back on Saturday and Sunday
Atleast that way you can choose to stay back. (if you still have a home πŸ™‚ )

Its the same everywhere I suppose – have suffered rains in B’lore and of late Mumbai..its diwali time for auto-wallahs!..recently in Thane (where I work), I was being charged 3 times the usual rate to get to my home when it would have taken only 15/20 mins and around 20 Rs by auto…I was so pissed with the auto guy, I actually walked back home in the rain..took me an hour though..:)..

I guess, when the going gets wet, the wet get going!!

Nina, rains are still romantic ( except for me and jammy [ and ofcourse rekha] as they have started a journey, that i am abt to finish) but there is nobody to romance. any takers??? lollzz…

BTW did anybody notice bracket inside a bracket?

oops.. forgot to comment on blog.. fantastic one jammy πŸ˜€

*those who chat in yahoo can make out the “:D” thing.

Don’t blame the rains, blame the city in which you live (Chennai is my birth-place).. I have seen heavier rains in cities overseas, they have superb storm-water drainage system, superb citi-planning, superb safety-precautions in place, whereas our drainage system is filled with plastic bags..

Wait till u guys experience the rain in delhi.we keep guessing whether its the yamuna and the drains or its just a water clogged road.

And the auto wallahs here dnt even hv to wait for rain to make a diwali out of it. Try getting a auto before 9 or after 7 here and they’ll get u. N these guys really know ” Unity is Strength”.

Jammy..If you remember what Baasha Bhai (The “naalum therinja route kaarar”) said….He promised that he will take pregnant women to the hospital free of charge, but not people caught in the rains… So Rekha can enjoy one free ride in a few months time πŸ™‚

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