Inside the Jet Airways flight

Last evening I left Mumbai by the 7.50 p.m. Jet Airways flight and reached Chennai.

I want to share with mere mortals like you, a small encounter I had with a petite air-hostess called Celina and me. If you also know her, I would want you to press my case. Not my suitcase!

She had just finished serving me a vegetarian dinner – with the same care and compassion my wife Rekha used to show while serving me dinner in the early days of our marriage.

Perhaps she had been following my habits, for immediately after dinner Celina walked the aisle, passing many other passengers on the way, and stopped right in front of me.

She asked: “Tea, sir?”

I gave my 100 million cents smile. She repeated: “Sir, would you want T?”

With my 100 million cents smile intact, I relied: “I don`t want T. If it is the alphabet that you are asking about, I would want U!”

She did pour the T for me. Just that by mistake she spilled it all over my fluorescent lime colored Arrow shirt and Indian Terrain Kakhis.

Other Must Reads
Why should you marry the girl you love?
A married man`s guide to safe and sound staring
Ten reasons why you need a girl friend…
A conversation overheard

By Jamshed V Rajan

Jammy, as Jamshed V Rajan is affectionately called, is a wannabe stand up comedian. He has a funny take on most things but documents only some of them. If you are interested in chatting up with him, do drop him an email at jv.rajan@gmail.com or message him at +919650080255.

33 replies on “Inside the Jet Airways flight”

HI Rajan,

I am a reguralr visitor to your blog. THough I did enjoy my previous visits, I regret to tell you that, I am getting a little bored with ur genre of comedy, coz its now started becoming very predictable and also boring. I seriously feel that your ability is much more than what we get to see in some of your latest posts. If you can get back to that pedestal again. Ull sure be he king again.

Thanks.

wrongone: Thanks mate…you are one of the few who have given a positive feedback on this post. Perhaps, you have been successfully Jammyilized!

Mehak: thanks mate…I need all the luck especially coz today’s air hostess dont care about if you if you don’t fly the first class. Also, if you are already married (the ring shows, remember)

Uma: Bad luck indeed…but what can a married one do? Just sit and pray…if I weren’t married already would have taken the next flight in which she was a cabin crew and given her a piece of my mind. I would have started with: “You know how difficult it is to propose marriage to a girl who drops hot tea on one’s lap?”

nina: It was hot tea Nina. Apparently top corporate honchos don’t drink cold tea…thats supposed to be for the yuppies

J: Hi mate…i totally agree. I am feeling guilty but have my reasons – lack of time. Will keep your comment in mind when i come up with the next post…as the first step…I read through some of my earlier posts to get a feel of my humor at its best. I should tell you that it sucks.

As for the “pedestal” & “King” bit…noway…I don’t think I am there yet. Though sometimes I feel that I am better than PG Wodehouse, Art Buchwald, Kushwant Singh and Erma Brombeck 😉

Saran: Talk of Ganguly man…awesome dude…when he was ropped I knew he would come back again. Now…if Dravid fails Indians in the four one dayers against West Indies … we might even see a Ganguly becoming the captain again.

And hey…I agree…the recent posts haven’t been any good. But I have my excuses…

Ranjhith: You really need to see a psychiatrist. I mean…i played with T and U….and you doubled the impact by playing with V & W. Heights! If I were jobless….you were double jobless!

Now you want somebody to try “X”! Some balls!

kausik: I have a feeling u dont trust me! Maybe one of these days I should scan all my boarding passes, work on the photoshop to increase the number of trips…and then upload them onto this blog.

Praveen: Thanks man for your feedback….will work on better articles hereafter. I promise. But would love it if you don’t use foul language on this site…I see that you have tried to mask the continuous present tense of the four letter word by typing it in as “f *****” and I appreciate that. 😉

Megha: I also agree with J’s comment. In fact I so much agree with him (or her) that I want to know who the real person is. I would like to thank him/her personally for the blunt, in-your-face feedback. More so, if J is a lady.

As for the “pedestal” & “King” bit…noway…I don’t think I am there yet. Though sometimes I feel that I am better than PG Wodehouse, Art Buchwald, Kushwant Singh and Erma Brombeck…
There U r man.. U havent lost ur form u just lost ur speed thats it

[…] About Jamshed Velayuda Rajan Rekha is pregnant and happy The Kingfisher Class – Part 1 A visit to Fan India, Chennai Married men need mistresses Getting to know sex thro’ Fashion TV Different types of fathers in law When the baby and the mother bond and forget the father The initial months of pregnancy Accepting gifts from relatives Once inside the Jet Airways Can somebody tell me what women want Inviting friends over […]

Keep Your 100 million cents smile & Your Wise Cracks 4 Your Wife. Answer The Damn Question & Let Her Do Her Job. To Hell With Your fluorescent lime colored Arrow shirt and Indian Terrain Kakhis; Had it been a foreign Airline (sing along) “She With Her T, wud burn that from where U P”. Get A Life Man

Well ur not the first 1 who comes on board thinking to be a gods gift to mankind.We very well identify pricks like u.There r a lot of people who think that we r under paid n waiting for desperate arseh@les like u to pick 1 out of many atleast.U will be surprised to know that most of the crew r from good families n can take ur wife out for a good holiday…..a better one than u can afford.Try n be a lil sensitive u dumFuk.We work on board with a lot of pressure n our job is to safeguard u from any emergencies though we might at times be a reason for a small accident n in ur case i guess u missed the point that was not an accident she just replied that not “T” or “U’ but u need to cool down ur willy.Im sure u work somewhere too n u must have witnessed a lot of people who force themselves on to u (Pile Ons….remember) ur no diff.Think About it.
Just another crew.

Jet Airways sucks, Jet Airways is a racist airline, Jet Airways is an airline Bigot!

Jet Airways is one of the racist airlines in the world.
I was delayed for 3 hours, even when I was early. And after the delay, guess what? They said that they needed to be furnished with supporting documents. Supporting documents that no other passengers have to provide, but myself. Then even when those so-called “supporting documents” are produced and showed to them, they refused to give me my boarding pass, based on the bag I was carrying (I was not using one of those “trolley bags” that people generally bring for holidays). Based on this they thought that I’m some kind of poor chap trying to stray off to another country. That was what they said. This is discrimination!

Furthermore, they vigorously denied me the boarding pass, only after I have confronted them with the fact that I have a beard, therefore a muslim. This is again discrimination!
It’s not that the proof was not there. It was there. I showed them. But they denied. I can only think that this is obviously a biased attitude, based on pure discrimination, not facts. They won’t even accept tangible proof.

I as a muslim, am disgusted by these unfair treatment based on my religious belief.
Truly Jet Airways ought to be ashamed of their racism, and religious discrimination.

NOW WHERE IS MY REFUND!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *