Laloo Prasad Yadav, Minister for Railways

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Manmohan Singh`s decision is bound to have far-reaching effects. Thanks mainly to the Indian Railway`s network spread far and wide.

I am sure, all of us are glad that such an important ministry is in the safe hands of Laloo. A few critics suggest that he should have got the Agriculture portfolio. A few sterner critics explicitly hint that he should have been made Minister of State for Animal Husbandry. Pity those critics for they do not know that this was a revolutionary decision. Here are some pointers –

For the common folks
– If you are from Bihar, you need not buy train tickets
– If you are traveling in Bihar, you need not buy the tickets
– The vegetable vendors are free to ply their trade on all inter-state trains. You could sell pets too, but only domesticated.
– Beedi smoking will be allowed. But the ban on cigarette smoking will stay.
– If you are Laloo`s relative, you need not reserve your tickets early.
– The pantry cars will also sell cowfeed. But large scale buying and selling won`t be permitted.

For the rich folks
– If you are from Bihar, you are requested not to buy tickets. Just enter the compartment, grab a seat, walk up to the pantry, buy large quantities of the cowfeed being sold, walk back and light a cigarette and relax.

Here is a story that I read about Laloo. Thought will share it: Laloo was giving an enthusiastic speech. During his verbal diarrhea, he held out a potato in his right hand and a tomato in his left. He looked at the potato…sported his customary smile and said, “This is us, the RJD….strong …cannot be crushed.” Even as he said the above, he tried to squeeze the potato…but nothing happened…and the crowd roared. He then shifted his attention to the tomato and said, “this is the opposition and we will crush them.” So saying, he crushed the tomato. The crowd went ecstatic. Laloo had to be evacuated by a helicopter because the spectators broke through the security barricade. One wonders what was on their mind!

By Jamshed V Rajan

Jammy, as Jamshed V Rajan is affectionately called, is a wannabe stand up comedian. He has a funny take on most things but documents only some of them. If you are interested in chatting up with him, do drop him an email at jv.rajan@gmail.com or message him at +919650080255.

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