Marriage & Olympics…

Yesterday London won the right to host the 2012 Olympics. It proves the age-old story that David can slay the Goliath anytime. BTW, did you know that David Beckham led the London bid?

You are probably wondering why I speak of the Olympics on a platform where I lay bare the tortures of a wife called Rekha. You are justified.

In a way Marriage is like Olympics. You first invest everything you got in winning the bid, you then prepare for the actual ceremony, and after the ‘Games` are over you realize that it was not worth the effort.

Let us start from the bidding. While I have always maintained that Rekha begged me to marry her, it was actually I who chased her for close to three years. There were many other contenders (in the case of Olympics…cities) who cried for attention. But because I invested all my earnings and presented my case nicely, I won the bid. Rekha agreed to marry me. Just like how London has now won the bid to host the 2012 Olympics.

After she agreed, I could not focus on any other girls…for she was always lurking around. Naturally, initial excitement was lost. Just like how the people of London will soon get cured of the Olympics fever.

Meanwhile, I had to start investing in infrastructure. A house, a television, a fridge…basically everything that cost a bomb was necessary to set up a home. Just like how London will now start investing in stadiums, swimming pools, Olympic villages etc.

During this period of heavy investment I got disillusioned. At some point I even wondered if it was all worth the effort. Just like how the people of London will wonder when money from far more important ventures will be moved to the Olympic Fund…to build Olympic infrastructure.

Even before I had set up a home, the marriage date closed in. Just like how the Olympics Authorities will find it difficult to put all infrastructure and processes in place before the Olympics begin.

But then, the date for my marriage was fixed….and as you all can testify…my marriage did happen. It was quite a grand affair…invitations, decorations, ceremonies, spectators…everything that one could think of. Just like how the Opening Ceremony of the London Olympics 2012 will be.

And then the Games began. Rajan trying to pip Rekha to the post. Rekha trying to out-do Rajan. Rekha pulling down Rajan from the parents-popularity chart. Rekha setting a World record in non-stop talking. Rajan setting a world-record in being silent and grumpy. There were sprints, throws, jumps, ….all sorts of games. Just like the Games London will host in 2012.

The only difference is in the duration of the Games. In a marriage they last a lifetime. In Olympics they last a fortnight.

But once I am 60 years of age, and if Rekha leaves me alone for a minute (I think by then she would have mastered the art of speaking 120 words/minute) I am bound to wonder if it was all worth the effort….after all, we would be alone…and our house would be empty. Just like how the Organizing committee of the London Olympics will wonder if all that effort was worth it because like all the other Olympic Games, they would have also incurred losses. Not to mention that entire bouquet of stadiums, swimming pools, Olympic villages lying useless.

On second thoughts…I wouldn`t really care for the emptiness, for my kids would have taken wings and will be living a life elsewhere….still thinking of the days they spent with their parents. Just like all those athletes at the London Olympics, who would have taken wings and gone places…but would still be cherishing their Olympic moments at London.

London, way to go!

By Jamshed V Rajan

Jammy, as Jamshed V Rajan is affectionately called, is a wannabe stand up comedian. He has a funny take on most things but documents only some of them. If you are interested in chatting up with him, do drop him an email at jv.rajan@gmail.com or message him at +919650080255.

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