Much married, much harried

I can now say that I am a much married man. I say ‘much married` because we crossed our second wedding anniversary on 8th September. Despite the body and mind willing (actually, more of the body) I haven`t married many times. 
Have you notices that the word “Harried” rhymes with the word “Married”? Now you know why Prince Charles and Princess Diana named their son Harry when their marriage got sour. They were letting the World know that they were plain-and-simple harried with each other.

Moving on to today`s topic…after two years of marriage with Rekha…I have realized that whatever a husband does, he can`t regain his independence and freedom of thought & speech. Last night all my mates went out for a drink…I like a fool called up Rekha to tell her…but ended up going home after she ordered me straight home. 
If you are bachelor, you might think I am not man enough. But the beauty is…nobody is man enough. I am sure Osama Bin Laden (some say he is Laden with shit) is changing places every week not because US President George Bush will find him, but because his wife will reach him.

Take this example from my life…as a bachelor during my initial, happy days in Chennai, I used to frequent a small hotel in Triplicane. One evening, as I sat for my regular plate of egg-dosa to arrive…I saw the hotel owner serving at the next table. Very unbecoming of the man, I thought. I had known him for the last eight months and he always came in a sparking white Khadar shirt and dhoti and sit behind the counter. I looked up at the counter and saw a lady with a bit of Mehendi in her forearms. I smiled (the one that has floored many a girls), for the Hotel owner had also fallen victim to the practices corporate employ – show them pretty faces and sell them kitty feces. 
I called him to my table and asked him: “And why would you be serving? Shouldn`t you be sitting at the counter?”

“Well, yesterday the management changed.” 
I was confused. Management change? I didn`t know that such small hotels had a Board of Directors. I thought it better to confirm.

“Management changed? What do you mean?” I think I almost shouted, for through the corner of my eye I saw the lady at the counter turn towards me. 
“Shhh…don`t shout….she might hear us.”

I tried not looking at the lady in the counter and asked the man: “Who is she?” 
“It is not like before. Things have changed. I got married yesterday, and now she is the boss.”

Without replying, I stared at the lady for a while. I think I must have stared at the lady for a whole five minutes for I heard the erstwhile hotel owner say: “By the way, that`s my wife.” 
I still remember, I had seen traces of Rekha (we were in love back then) in the lady behind the counter. I had thought it was love – if you are in love, aren`t you supposed to see your lover in everybody? Shucks….if only I had taken the hint!

By Jamshed V Rajan

Jammy, as Jamshed V Rajan is affectionately called, is a wannabe stand up comedian. He has a funny take on most things but documents only some of them. If you are interested in chatting up with him, do drop him an email at jv.rajan@gmail.com or message him at +919650080255.

11 replies on “Much married, much harried”

[…] # 1. About Jamshed Velayuda Rajan # 2. Rekha is pregnant and happy # 3. The Kingfisher Class – Part 1 # 4. A visit to Fan India, Chennai # 5. Married men need mistresses # 6. Getting to know sex thro’ Fashion TV # 7. Different types of fathers in law # 8. When the baby and the mother bond and forget the father # 9. The initial months of pregnancy # 10. Accepting gifts from relatives # 11. # 12. Once inside the Jet Airways # 13. Can somebody tell me what women want # 14. Inviting friends over # 15. Why should you marry the girl you love # 16. Sexual escapades of a married man # 17. Our visit to a gynecologist # 18. Trained Romance # 19. Making full use of the bath tub # 20. The art of swearing unnoticed # 21. Mother in law vs daughter in law # 22. When Rekha and I visited Mocha, Chennai # 23. A married man’s guide to safe and sound staring # 24. Am I a lesbian? # 25. Sex on television # 26. The origin and art of kissing # 27. Why do men always pee in the wrong place? # 28. I think I am pregnant # 29. Ten sentences you will never hear your wife say # 30. Much married, much harried # 31. A fat chance – never call your wife fat # 32. Valentine’s day is over. Phew! # 33. Ten reasons why you need a girl friend # 34. My world is suddenly crowded # 35. The conversation between Osama and Batman […]

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