Seven wonders of my World (please vote)

Even if you had been in Timbuktu (in Mali) for the last three months, you would have known about the contest surrounding the Seven Wonders of the World. And you can`t just blame Timbuktu`s presence in the probables list…the contest was all over the town, World & television.

My company – the new internet start-up I quit Yahoo for – MIH Internet, has its own version where they ask users to vote for Taj. Quite a timely exercise. If you had been buried in a coffin and got out only now, you can read about this contest here.

Since everybody is busy selecting their own Wonders of the World, I thought why shouldn`t I write about the seven wonders of Jammy`s World.

Here goes –

My Wife

I am not comparing my wife to a monument because I consider marrying her a monumental mistake. Neither am I calling her a wonder of my life because she is a Tun-Tun in the making. She makes this list because we both are chalk and cheese (she being the cheese, coz chalk isn`t sour) and yet she has managed to pull along well. Before our marriage her father once told me that in marriage husband and wife are like the two oxen in a bullock cart – both have to pull together for the marriage to be a success. Today, almost three years after our marriage I wonder if he was hinting that she was a beast of burden. My burden.

My Name

My full name is Jamshed Velayuda Rajan and that`s because my father wanted to have as many religions in my name as possible. While I am glad he didn`t name me Jamshed Velayuda Rajan Singh, so that Sikkism could also be added…I wonder what he achieved by naming me thus. Now, that my father is no more with us — I will keep wondering.

My Blog

My blog www.ouchmytoe.com has brought me name, fame and money. But I wonder how. I wonder what bunch of losers would want to read about the rants of a total loser like me. Talking of my blog, I am today working with a lady called Uma Iyer who claims to have once put my blog under Rediffblog`s Sizzling Blogs section…I wonder why….

My Kid

I wondered when Rhea, my 100-day old baby girl, walked out of a window (she was born out of a Caesarian delivery) on March 29 this year. I wonder when she smiles in her sleep. I wonder when she twirls her hair with one hand and puts her other hand in her mouth – all five fingers. I wonder why Indian Airlines asked me to buy a ticket for Rhea (costing a cool Rs 1700/-) even though she traveled sleeping in my wife`s lap.

My Internet connection

I wonder what life would be without my internet connection. No blogs, no mails, no games, no Google Adsense, no Y! Messenger, and no porn. What would I have done for a living had it not been for the internet? Maybe a sports journalist…traveling the world? For those of you reading my blog for the first time…if my father hadn`t run away from his village in 1965…I would have taken up the family profession – rearing sheep.

My Beer

Many would argue against the need for a high when the wife isn`t around…but believe me…a beer once in a while doesn`t hurt. The only problem I face with beer is disposing the six one-foot-tall bottles the next morning. I wonder why they can`t have a beer concentrate which can be mixed with water and had in a glass. I wonder if it is because after a few beers, it is hard to concentrate.

My handkerchief

This is one aspect of my life you don`t want to be part of. The kerchief I carry is a weapon in disguise…I wonder why the airport security don`t spot it…how the dogs they train don`t smell it. I wonder what my life would be without my handkerchief…a very clean, pure but useless existence?

Other Good Reads

# When I became a cockroach
# Rekha and I are proud parents
# Come to me baby!
# Kissing – how it all began

Topics you thought Jammy never wrote about…

Sex, Nude, Kiss, Porn, Asian,

By Jamshed V Rajan

Jammy, as Jamshed V Rajan is affectionately called, is a wannabe stand up comedian. He has a funny take on most things but documents only some of them. If you are interested in chatting up with him, do drop him an email at jv.rajan@gmail.com or message him at +919650080255.

11 replies on “Seven wonders of my World (please vote)”

Jammy, I almost got confused by the ad of Zee Cafe with Mischa Barton. Ironic fact is it is placed right next to you talking abt your wife!! Point to ponder..eh?

I think you should add more choices and then ask your readers to vote for your list of seven wonders 😀 u can go the whole way, SMSs and all, good way to make some money.. aintit?

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