Sonia and Manmohan caught on tape

Inspired by this guy at

Here is the transcript of a discussion between Sonia Gandhi and Manmohan Singh, just before the Italian lady decided not to become the Prime Minister.

SONIA: Praji, do you think I should become the first foreign Prime Minister of India?
MANMOHAN: Not necessarily.
SONIA: You suggesting that I should not?
MANMOHAN: I did not mean that.
SONIA: What did your statement imply?
MANMOHAN: Just that the BJP, esp Shusma Swaraj and Uma Bharati would not be very happy if you become the PM.
SONIA: Guess you are right. How about Rahul or Priyanka as the PM?
MANMOHAN: Maybe not. Remember, they are half Italians?
SONIA: I do not understand this hatred for Italians. They seem to love Pizza and Ferrari.
MANMOHAN: Yes, it baffles me sometimes. In fact, the most ardent Ferrari fan Vinesh Nair is against you becoming the PM.
SONIA: You must be kidding!
MANMOHAN: No, I am serious. In fact, he has started a drive against you. While he is holding his cards close to his chest, our intelligence reports suggest that he has quit having Pizza.
SONIA: What do you suggest?
MANMOHAN: I am ready to share your burden. I could become the Prime Minister. Would help the keep the Sensex steady.
SONIA: How will you manage that?
MANMOHAN: How would I know? It always happens. Remember, everything was hunky-dory when I was the Finance Minister last time.
SONIA: I do not remember.
MANMOHAN: Don`t you remember that guy called Rajan who wanted to become a Surgeon but decided to do Economics only because I was awarded the title “1993`s Best Finance Minister of Asia”.
SONIA: Ok fine. Assume you become the PM. What is in it for me?
MANMOHAN: You could become the Foreign Minister and catch up with your family at the Govt`s cost. Moreover, the World would know that you are not power hungry.
SONIA: What about that ex-Uttar Pradesh MP who is threatening to shoot himself if I do not become the PM?
MANMOHAN: I enquired. It seems he was a theatre artist before he entered politics.
SONIA: That solves it. What if you sideline me after becoming the PM?
MANMOHAN: I cannot do that. You know I am a sardarji and I cannot think, leave alone conspire.
SONIA: That`s true.
MANMOHAN: Also, I can keep a check on Maneka and her son.
SONIA: But I want a road in every locality named after me. Preferably, roads next to the ones named after my husband Rajiv.
MANMOHAN: Sure, can arrange for that. Anything else?
SONIA: How about a statue in Chennai?
MANMOHAN: Why Chennai?
SONIA: They are the only people who allow for statues when the person is living.
MANMOHAN: Done deal. But you might have to wait till we overthrow Jayalalitha. With her around you cannot dream of any statue…she is known for removing them in the middle of the night.
SONIA: Understandable.
MANMOHAN: What do we do with Pranab Mukherjee?
SONIA: How about the Finance Ministry?
MANMOHAN: I had reserved it for P Chidambaram.
SONIA: Shucks. Lets keep our options open. Greedy buggers will go to any levels to get a Ministry. Understandable though, eight years out of power empties the coffers.
MANMOHAN: Ok. It is 11.30 in the night. Meet me tomorrow at my office to discuss the cabinet.
SONIA: I can already feel a change in you.
MANMOHAN: Oops! Ms Sonia, when can I drop by at your office? Need your advice on the Cabinet Ministers.
SONIA: Hmm…..will check with Rahul and let you know tomorrow morning.
MANMOHAN: Did I just hear a Dictaphone click….

I then picked up my dictaphone and ran for my life.

By Jamshed V Rajan

Jammy, as Jamshed V Rajan is affectionately called, is a wannabe stand up comedian. He has a funny take on most things but documents only some of them. If you are interested in chatting up with him, do drop him an email at or message him at +919650080255.

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