Ten reasons why you need a girl friend

To show-off
I know most of you men out there will agree that girl friends are a little difficult to walk with. I am not referring to their slow gait in tight trousers ..but figuratively. Not many of us actually like to walk on a busy road with a girl friend in tow? But we are forced to do that because of peer pressure. As a 24-year-old gentleman I spoke to last night put it: “Ritesh has one, Prakash has one and even that dud Sunil has one. Won`t I be considered a loser if I don`t have a girl friend?”

To increase bank balance
Rekha would agree to this. Had it not been for Rekha, I wouldn`t have had such a nice bank balance (Rs 107.56 paise) when I got married. I agree that once the marriage is fixed girls don`t contribute much …but before that they come quite handy. To pay credit cards when the bankers come chasing, to pay phone bills when the connections are cut, to pay the rent when the landlord threatens….we all need girl friends. But are these girls doing it for us? No way…instead for their own selfish needs. If the credit card is blocked…she won`t be taken to the restaurant, if the phone connection stays pulled…no late night romantic calls…and if there is no house to go back to…what about those private moments?

To feel wanted on birthdays
If I had no Rekha, I might as well have forgotten my birthdays. For the last five years she is the first person to wish me. But she is also the first person to ask for a treat…and to top it…she has even managed to make my birthday treats two-people affairs. When was the last time I had merry on my birthday evening? I don`t remember. We get birthday cards, gifts, mugs…et all. The thumb rule of birthdays spent with a girl friend is: “The total cost of the gifts will always be less than the cost of the evening dinner.” But having been used to women pampering us all our lives…we don`t mind the cost. What we mind is the settling down and having kids and naming him/her….Akaash/Arpita… so that he/she could be first in the attendance register…kind of talk. Especially on happy days like birthdays.

For emergency back-up
The thing about emergencies is…if they start happening too often they cease to be emergencies. Many a times we men need liquid cash for important things like a can of beer or a movie ticket. We need moral support because the girl we approach happened to be the daughter of the local dada. Or we need to be dropped at the railway station because we have given our bike/car for servicing. If you ask me, we men need to credit the ladies for unstinted support they provide us when we are in trouble. Elders say: Don`t trouble trouble until trouble troubles you. But in this case the trouble itself comes forward to help us.

For use as a digital diary
We men don`t have a good memory. Perhaps that is why we invest so much on our mobile phones. And perhaps, that is why we have no hassles investing in a live digital diary -a girl friend. I am sure there have been many occasions when she has alerted you at the right time. Like when you have to go to wake up and get ready for the interview. Or maybe a medical check-up…or maybe catching a train on Friday evening. A woman`s memory is a yet-to-be-tapped resource. Try it and I am sure you won`t be disappointed. Mind you…memory is a good thing only till marriage….after which good memory for the lady means Saturn-hovering-over-the-head for the gent.

Eyecandy: To add glamour to life
Who doesn`t love to have a lady nearby? I do. The formula one guys do. Sania Mirza`s supporters do. This wouldn`t have been a problem if the ladies didn`t know the secret. Now that it is out in the open we can`t do much about it. Knowing our weakness for glamour…the ladies have started presenting themselves as show pieces. So much so… last survey showed that the number of feminists in India was coming down. Ladies have realized they can get the men to do a whole lot more if they are Eyecandy.

To book tickets
Rekha has done this for me. And I am sure your girl friend has also done this for you. Be it movie, train, bus, theatre, or restaurants….they have booked at all places. Perhaps because the people picking up the phones are more accommodative to a lady`s voice. The good thing about getting your girl friend to book tickets for you is…she finds it cheap to ask for the money…hence uses her own. 😉

Everybody needs a gossip machine
Agreed we men are not gossip machines. But it doesn`t hurt to get a dose of this and that once in a while. Especially, if it is about the escapades of our girl`s pretty friend. It gives us an idea of what chance we stand. The one problem with this requirement is…the phones always run with high bills and are without charge.

As the first-level shock absorber
According to the ladies, men don`t have an eye for colours. I guess…we should start wearing more of beige and pink and peach. But then, without these ladies we would have gone out to the World looking stupid. Without them who will tell us that our zip is not up, our face has an extra dash of Cuticura talcum powder, our shirt goes well with the trouser but has a stain on the wrong hand….

The Tenth Reason
I leave this to you. After all Rekha and Rajan are not the only lady and gent in this World. But knowing the men…. I know what this tenth reason would be!

By Jamshed V Rajan

Jammy, as Jamshed V Rajan is affectionately called, is a wannabe stand up comedian. He has a funny take on most things but documents only some of them. If you are interested in chatting up with him, do drop him an email at or message him at +919650080255.

7 replies on “Ten reasons why you need a girl friend”

another thing that should be added to this list:

1. Have a girl friend…breakup and then youll realise what you were missing(when you had her of course!!)…this feeling of self realization is priceless….so much freedom that was voluntarily lost and now regained, you can finally stop at 11 in the night for a cup of tea by the roadside, you can wear the same undies on 2 days..bla bla bla…the feeling is priceless…which is why you should have HAD a girl friend..but of course, be sensible about it and breakup and do not marry..i repeat, DO NOT MARRY!!!!!

One more reason to have a girl friend is to have a personal acccountant to control and budget your expenses
Girls tend to keep secrets about everybody very well, and I got access to gossip which I would have never had If I was single!

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