Changing the World with bombs

In a way bombs are like candies. Easily available, cheap and loads of fun.

I was left wondering where all these bombs are made? In factories? If yes, are these companies listed on the Bombay Stock Exchange? Coz, if they are …I sure want to buy the stocks. After all…they are making shit-loads of money.

Let us assume, they don`t make bombs in factories, coz if they did…bombs would also come in glossy packaging. For all we know, there would be Television advertisements selling bombs of various kinds.

After seeing the ads, if I end up in a shop…would the shop-keeper sell me a bomb?
Or will he ask me for age proof? Like how in US of A, you can`t buy a beer can if you are underage. But, I guess you can drink…

And if I have to show my age-proof, what would be the right age to buy a bomb? At 24-years would I qualify to buy a bomb? Ok…Ok…I am not 24…I am 27….

And if I do manage to get my hands on a bomb how can I be sure that I don`t blow myself up. Do they have a user manual that I can read before I go about planting a bomb? Or is it one of those plug and play types….

I wonder if they ever tried to have a training session for all those who bought a bomb. I am sure, they must have tried it out. Probably, it was stopped because Professors and scholars were no longer forthcoming to teach. One thing is for sure, the training sessions would have always been all theory and no practicals.

On second thoughts, if bombs were so popular…wouldn`t the AK-47s lose their market? The people used to seeing live about-to-blow-up bombs in other`s hands would no longer be afraid of AK-47s. With the AK-47 sales dwindling, the Russian economy will experience a steep decline.

Because, every Tom, Dick & Harry can afford to scare his neighbor with a bomb, terrorism will no longer be a lucrative career option. Many will quit LTTE, IRA or for that matter Hizb-ul-Mujahideen.

Terrorism will become such a badly paying profession that Osama will also emerge from behind Bush. Oops…from behind the Bush, if you know what I mean.

Because everybody will have a bomb in hand….nobody will steal, nobody will rob. Everybody will be honest. The Utopian world. So much so…nobody would come forward to claim their fields. Mine fields, that is.

With nobody to claim the mine fields, no children will lose their legs in mine blasts. As for their hands…one cannot be sure…they would be holding bombs you see….

Moral of the Story: However hard you try to change the World, you just cannot. It has a way of balancing itself.

Moral of the Moral: When somebody craps, don`t go beyond Moral of the Story.

By Jamshed V Rajan

Jammy, as Jamshed V Rajan is affectionately called, is a wannabe stand up comedian. He has a funny take on most things but documents only some of them. If you are interested in chatting up with him, do drop him an email at or message him at +919650080255.

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