Domestic violence on the men?

In the sixties, women asked for equality. In 30 years time, they would have it. In another 10 years time, they would treat men like dirt.

I know it`s a shame, but I got to admit that I am subjected to domestic violence. I have proof – the burn marks on my well-developed calf muscles, the cane marks on my rounded-off knuckles and the cigarette burns on my long, slender back.

You probably think I am a lady. No, I am a modern man…that of the 21st century. Exploited, yet not intimidated.

I still remember the days when men were macho. Then they started coloring their hair…a few did the nail polish…some wore shirts with frills. Then they started calling themselves Metrosexuals. Even as the men were sucked into the lady`s domain, the average lady entered the macho world – going bungee jumping, getting tickets for speeding, getting sloshed on weekends and watching cricket.

For me, it all started a few days after marriage. I don`t know what she wanted…more money, some more respect, a slave….I have never been sure. But she has been subjecting me to domestic violence.

My neighbor, Mr Prakash also has similar problems.

“My wife is very edgy, so I am careful while talking to her,” he says.

“Mine too. Perhaps, it`s the tension at office,” I support his opinion.

“Maybe. But what wrong did I do. All I ever did was love her and then give up my parents to get married to her,” my neighbor repents.

“At least, I can go to my parents house (read Sasural) for a few days. You can`t even do that.” I feel bad for Mr Prakash coz his was more of a ‘Love marriage` than mine.

Our conversation came to an abrupt end coz, my neighbor had to rush inside the house. His wife`s car was rolling into the parking lot, you see.

It is a pity. Because a handful of men liked wearing nail polish and shaving their chest hair (seen Shah Rukh Khan?)…today man has lost his hold on the society. I have realized this early enough to not waste time strategizing against my wife.

But, I am not taking it lying down. I have bought a punching bag …and when Rekha is not at home…I drape it with an old churidhaar of hers and do my punching. That way, I don`t hurt her…I don`t hurt myself.

By Jamshed V Rajan

Jammy, as Jamshed V Rajan is affectionately called, is a wannabe stand up comedian. He has a funny take on most things but documents only some of them. If you are interested in chatting up with him, do drop him an email at or message him at +919650080255.

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