How do I get six packs in three months?

Way back in October 2005, we had bought a treadmill. Don`t believe me? You might want to read the posts titled ‘Getting a treadmill for the house…` dated Oct 3, 2005 and ‘Treadmill and its implications` dated Oct 12, 2005.

It has been more than two years since we broke open our earthen Piggy Bank to pay for the Rs 24,000 automatic treadmill. In the last 30 months I would have used it not more than 100 times – and that`s just a running distance of 100+ kilometers, for I never lasted more than 10 minutes.

Till mid 2006 the treadmill was a major point of our conversation. Guests, relatives and friends asked about. The adventurous, even tried it. By late 2006, the Rs 24,000 treadmill was being used to hang wet towels and stick post-it notes. By mid 2007, it was time to move to Gurgaon and when the Agarwal Movers and Packers asked me where they should keep the treadmill, I asked: “Why don`t you see if there is space in the store room?”

That was the last I remember about the treadmill.

Rekha did mention once that she heard a rat running in the store room. But since I didn`t suspect the rat to be using the treadmill, I dismissed her suggestion.

Eight months and four-inches-around-the-waist later….our treadmill was discussed again. Four girls in my office – Uma, Sunandini, Dia and Sonali – were sharing their dinning table with me and one of them ended up commenting on my well-rounded tummy.

“I bet you are carrying a baby girl in there,” one of them commented, pointing generally in the direction of my tummy.

“Baby girls? You better be careful….I carry whole women inside.” I retorted. But everybody saw through that the aggression was that of a wounded man. A man hardened by years of exercise, but now caught up in the task of community building. Hell has no fury like a woman scorned, they say….but I think that can be said of men too. For that very moment I decided to gain Shah Rukh Khan like six-packs and show these girls what I was made of (flesh, of course!).

When I threw the challenge at the girls, they readily accepted it. Dia even went to the extent of saying that if I managed six packs in three months time – the cut off date being May 18 – she would erect a cut out of mine at her desk.

This happened two days back, and since then the treadmill has been dusted and used at least once (and this time it wasn`t to hang wet towels). While I am working on my six packs….I wonder how my cut out would look on Dia`s desk. Something like the image given above?

Note: If you know of any short cuts to get six packs in three months, please let me know in the comment box.

Other Funny Posts

# Tackling Sympathetic Obesity Syndrome
# Looking for smiling joggers
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By Jamshed V Rajan

Jammy, as Jamshed V Rajan is affectionately called, is a wannabe stand up comedian. He has a funny take on most things but documents only some of them. If you are interested in chatting up with him, do drop him an email at jv.rajan@gmail.com or message him at +919650080255.

28 replies on “How do I get six packs in three months?”

Treadmill is quite a place to start… a piece of advic(s)e… food habits are extremely important if you want a six pack without which I can guarantee that you can never get a six pack. Quit all forms of carbohydrates and fatty foods (rice, potatoes, etc) and try only fruits, vegetables (not fried please, only boiled), chapathies, white meat (skinless) and fish, etc… hehehehe…it sounds daunting huh? I know, been there and not achieved it yet…good luck mate!!!

I know how to get six packs of beer…. If you do what Anwin says you might save enough to buy six pack in a weeks time!!

Jammy, forget it yaar! just think, is it worth all the effort,a ‘cut out’ at a girl’s desk. You are cut out for far better things in life,Jams beleive me. Have you read this guy Billy Shakespeare or whoever who wrote Julius Caesar, describe Cassius? Quote Beware Cassius has got a lean and hungry look,such men are dangerous Unquote.Is it not worth the while to be a harmless, rolly polly guy that everybody loves rather than a haggard looking, face drooping guy with sixpack abdomen a la SRK. Give it a thought dear.

hahahahahaha … cant stop laughing reading about treadmill

i read that shahrukh got some gym item for 2.5 lacs for making this six pack; he was having only soups, fruits and simple food;

really you need to come back to shape; i had started reading your blogs three years back and you were quite handsome then

Anna You want 6 pack in three months. wokay wokay… Incase you do have that six pack I will put a cut out of yours next to Namma CM and his son Chinna CM. I’d suggest you get a six pack of beer. Don’t know if you get those in god forsaken Gurgaon.Try Zaikas or Chinaar for some brands like “Godfather”,”Stumped”

Jams

1. You and Gymming??? Neverrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

2. Thats the worst piece of PHotoshop work I have seen in recent times..get somebody to help you and if you wanted six packs you should have tried arnie’s pic (of course his pic from his hey days..not any of the recent ones)

Cheers
~N~

See, so many people (commenters) thought you really want to a six pack. How un-humorous our janta have become!

I suggest that you fix an appointment and meet up with Mr. Kamal Hassan. He has taken 10 Avatars in one movie with the help of make-up. He might be of great help to you to get six packs within few hours. He has good contact in Hollywood also, in case you need a much better looking six pack.

He can even help you become any one of those girls; remember Chachi 420.

🙂

guys, you can tell that its not an actual picture
Its Sharukk Khan in Om Shanti Om, but that guy just put his face on Sharukk Khans face to make the body his own

oh u need a six pack ,yeah? ,,i cn jus c myself in u.. ‘hw can i get into being size zero in 3 mnths’?..n thts smethng which doesnt seem to happen.! and i hve not given up btw..! i hv jus chnged my mind..i now think tht looking a lil plumpy is being cute and girly!
well, anyway ur nt acting besides aish or deepika wth a six pack..? are u?
than y ru bothering too much yaa? jus thnk of loosing tht beer belly n keep fit, no ones goin to lift up ur shirt and look for the 6 pack.
six pack or family pack..kuch fark nahi padta, jus keep fit…if ur hopeless even wth it.. stop wearing those tight t shrts..conceal it!

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