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Complimenting & complicating your life

When a man makes a woman his wife….it is the highest compliment he can pay her. In 95% of the cases it is the last compliment. In the other 5% of cases, the last compliment is when the bags are being packed at the honeymoon location.

In most of these cases, this last ‘honeymoon` compliment is an indicator of the things to come. Here are some examples:

“You look good in a Saree!”
Meaning, the jeans that you are wearing now is bursting at its seams.

“You have worked hard this honeymoon, why don`t you sit and let me pack.”
Meaning, your packing is bad that we will need two extra bags.

Anyway, the brief is…making a woman your wife is the biggest compliment you can give her.

Ten years back my father gifted me a book by Dale Carnegie titled ‘How to Win Friends and Influence People`. It is a self help book that`s been on the New York Best Seller`s list for a whopping ten years and has sold 15 million copies so far. OK…now 15 million and one…now 15 million and three….now 15 million and four…. now 15 million and six….now 15 million and nine…

In the book, Dale Carnegie wanted me to compliment people no matter what. I began the practice 10 years back and have mastered the art. In the last ten years, I have complimented every person I have met at least once daily. So much so that I have run out of ideas.

Over the years I have also learnt never to give a compliment expecting a receipt for it. Especially because I am one dull and boring looking person – it only makes the life of the compliment receiver tough….makes him lie…and then go to hell.

Yesterday, with nothing else to say…I looked at my colleague Himanshu Mishra and said, “Nice shoulders!” He gave me a stare then and during lunch accosted me in the washroom. After a mild struggle, I managed to free myself and save my virginity.

Complimenting girls was easy earlier. I would start with the headband and work my way to the bindis, earrings, bangles, then to the anklets and then their high-heels.

With time, I wanted to improve on the quality of my compliments and ended up asking them to marry me. After all, didn`t somebody say that the best compliment you can give a lady is asking her to marry you?

Out of the 100s of girls I have asked out ….eight have agreed. What do I do? I am in a fix…please help!

Other Funny Reads

# Appreciating people who are different
# Am I turning into a woman?
# When deodorants got banned
# Maggi & Me – How Maggi has influenced my life
# Taking revenge, the Jammy way

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