Santa is a lucky old man

Sometimes I wonder if Santa is related to Santa (Bunta`s friend). But what if he is related…the old man in white would anyways visit only once a year.

I somehow like Santa`s idea of visiting all only once a year – keeps them yearning for more. The good thing is, Santa leaves before the presents are opened.

What I don`t understand is his entry through the chimney. Why not the front gate? What about all those houses that don`t have a chimney? Perhaps this is why, as a child I never got presents from the Santa…we used to live in an apartment in the 8th floor.

Did you know that Santa gifts us so much…but in his life has only had two pair of clothes? His first one was a brown overall…and now it is red. No connection with Coke, though there are some business stories that Coke was instrumental in give Santa the new red-and-white outfit.

New clothes or old…he is quite happy and gay. Perhaps that is why he has special interest in South Africa – the country where same-sex marriages were legalized ten years back. No, just kidding!

Maybe, he is a straight guy who has the addresses of all the bad girls in town …in his address book. With no wife to censure him…he would be having a roll. I have a feeling he keeps thinking of these bad girls….coz whenever I see him anywhere he goes: Ho! Ho! Ho!

A cousin of mine got a pet as a gift from Santa. Unfortunately…the Santa left it in one of my cousin`s dirty sox…and the pet died before it could be discovered. Now, my 10-year old cousin wants a pet lizard…just like the one Santa brought.

Santa didn`t come to my house. Wonder if I had been a bad boy the whole of last year….or there was some problem back home for Santa. But then…why would a bunch of elfs create problem…when they have to work only one day in a year? Elfs with low (s)elf-esteem!

By Jamshed V Rajan

Jammy, as Jamshed V Rajan is affectionately called, is a wannabe stand up comedian. He has a funny take on most things but documents only some of them. If you are interested in chatting up with him, do drop him an email at or message him at +919650080255.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *