Tata Nano, cars and other related issues

Harry Kurnitz was once asked what he thought of Volkswagens. He said: “I have been in bigger women.” Not a polite thing to say, but I think the same of Tata Nano. Very unfortunate then, that Ratan Tata (the man who dreamt of Tata Nano and made it possible) has a father who shares his first name with me – Jamshedji Ratanji Tata.

In Automobile industry there have been quite a few car-for-the-masses experiments and not all have succeeded. We all know that Henry Ford`s Model T was a success…but then what about Yugoslavia`s cheap car project…which ended up making Yugo?

The Yugoslavian Car - Yugo

The Yugoslavian Car Fiasco – Yugo

Here are some Yugo jokes I came across when I used to handle Sify`s automobile channel called Carstreet.com.

# How do you upgrade a Yugo car?
– Put in an engine.

# Why do Yugos have heated rear windows?
– To keep your hands warm when you’re pushing them.

# What goes on pages 4-5 of the Yugo user’s manual?
– The train & bus schedule.

# What is the sport-version of Yugo?
– The driver wears Nike shoes.

# What do you call a Yugo at the top of a hill?
– A miracle.

# What do you call two Yugos at the top of a hill?
– A mirage.

# How do you double the value of a Yugo?
– Half fill it with gasoline!


Having born in the era of white Ambassadors with curtains and mini fans, I didn`t see much of cars till I was really old. My 10-month-old daughter has already tried her hand on my Suzuki Swift`s steering wheel…but I was at least 11 years old when I first sat in a car – my father`s unit Commanding officer`s car, when he spotted us walking to school.

It all happened so fast, that I couldn`t even move my bums up and down and feel the cushions.

I had to wait till I started working before I next sat in a car. I was working late one night and I asked my boss if he could call me a cab.

He eventually did…but not before asking: “Do you want me to call you a cab to your face or behind your back?”

The SMS I sent to my boss

The SMS I sent to my boss after buying a car

I remember sending the same boss an SMS, after I bought my Swift. See accompanying picture to see the SMS I sent. >>

Buying the car was the easy part…getting the four wheeler`s driving license wasn`t.

I remember the Brake Inspector asking me to demonstrate car parking. I thought I parked the car well, and walked up to him and asked: “So, how was it?”

“Well…it will get you a fine.”

“Ohh…and is ‘fine` enough? Or do I have to get a ‘good` or an ‘excellent`?

I remember being asked to try for my four wheeler`s license after three months.

If you have ridden a two-wheeler and now own a four-wheeler, you probably know the difference. When on my Yamaha 135, if I spotted an accident….I would drive carefully for the next ten minutes. Ever since I have bought a car I just say: “Kill ‘em bastards,” and drive faster.

Other Car Reads

# When this blogger met God
# Wish our real life had the benefits of online life
# How Indian wives take their husbands for a ride
# Sending off a girl to Mumbai

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