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Workplace

I don`t know how your workplace is. Mine have always been fun. Wonder if it is a reflection of me as a person (is this correct English?).

You won`t believe me but one of my colleagues comes to office naked. Now…nobody steals his chair. Sometimes he comes drunk, sometimes without deodorant but nobody complains…they are all too upset over him coming naked. Even at lunch he doesn`t need to spend money. He says: “Oops, left my wallet in my trousers.”

There are many who have a post-lunch siesta. Funny it may seem, but it is true…especially in technology companies where late hours are common. The problem is when you interrupt them mid-way they don`t accept that they were sleeping. Over the years they have practiced reciting sleepy statements like: “Just taking a power nap taught at the Management course” or “God bless all, Amen!”.

I have always believed that we go to workplaces to earn money. There is no loyalty. I mean…if somebody needed loyalty…they better get a Dog. Why me. On second thoughts …am I a dog?

But seriously, all workplaces have their issues…and thus it makes sense to work in a company that compensates you better for all the shit you need to take.

Especially after the IT boom, offices have become chaotic. Employees` get into trouble and employees get out…and those that don`t worry when they get into trouble probably already have a scapegoat in mind. And those that stay calm when the crisis is building around them probably don`t have enough IQ to comprehend the situation. Unfortunately, it is such people who are promoted because they are considered to have a cool head in crisis.

One mantra that I go by at workplace is….aim low, reach your goals, and avoid disappointment. Just don`t go around telling people that you are aiming low. You might end up becoming the target.

When the going gets tough, the tough get going.

We all have heard of the above statement in motivational speeches and seen it on huge wall-posters…but have we seen anything like this happening in our workplace? No way. In fact it is exactly the opposite: When the going gets tough, the tough take a tea break.

If you have trouble at office…but are not able to do anything about it…don`t worry. Just shift companies. Not talented enough to shift companies at will? Still no worries….in India the retirement age is 58….and that means only 30 more years. Hang on!

By Jamshed V Rajan

Jammy, as Jamshed V Rajan is affectionately called, is a wannabe stand up comedian. He has a funny take on most things but documents only some of them. If you are interested in chatting up with him, do drop him an email at jv.rajan@gmail.com or message him at +919650080255.

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