Different strokes for different folks

Thanks to Flash’s comment left here, I have realized that for the last 30 years of my life I have been referring to Storks as Strokes! What shame…on my teachers. Needless to say, you will have to keep this spelling mistake in mind while reading the post below.

I have always believed that God is losing his charm. No, I am not Satan but I definitely feel that God is losing his hold over today`s people. I stopped believing in him a few days after I got married to Rekha. It was shocking to know that God didn`t send the kids.

I am lucky, I came to know about God not supplying the kids in 2004 itself but I have a few nephews and nieces who don`t know that God is not the supplier of kids…and it is already 2007.

The other day one of my nieces asked (unfortunately, I can`t reproduce the six year old girl`s tone here): “Rajan, how did Shanti aunty get a baby boy?”

I stared at the girl. Sometimes staring helps. Most of the times, it doesn`t. I had to say something to stop her from staring back at me.

“Strokes visited Shanti auntie`s house last month and dropped a baby boy.” I was sure she would buy into the story.


“Yes, strokes. Strokes.” I repeated for emphasis.

“You mean the bird stroke?”


“Surprising. Because only last week I saw a Discovery channel documentary on Strokes, and they didn`t mention a thing.”

“The US Government as part of its war against terrorism has asked Discovery Channel to keep it under wraps.” I tried to talk like Condellaza Rice, but it didn`t help.

“But, I thought one had to be married to have a baby. How do the strokes know that a lady is married or not?”

“Before dropping the baby, the strokes look around for a man-woman pair shopping.” I wanted to end this at the earliest.

“A boy and girl who are just lovers could also be shopping together. How come the strokes don`t mistake them to be married and drop babies. Wouldn`t it be embarrassing if Santosh uncle and the lady he meets in the temple come home with a baby one day?”

“Strokes don`t make such mistakes. They are intelligent.” This had become like the chess game where both players have only their King and Queen and thus can`t win, but want to continue playing.

“How?” The kid asked me.

If kids that ask questions grow up to be intelligent, I am sure our President Dr Abdul Kalam would have asked many questions when young. But then, I am also sure that he wouldn`t have been a popular kid among his relatives.

“Strokes hover above the shop for a while, and if the man drops out of the shot for a smoke or a tea or a 2-ruppee packet of groundnuts…it is a sure sign that the couple is married. If the man and the woman come out laughing from the shop, the strokes don`t drop the baby.”

I thought I had ended the conversation but apparently I hadn`t…for my niece immediately asked: “I always thought God existed.”

I didn`t want to start another war…so just muttered “Jesus” and moved on.

Other Must Reads

# When the stomach is full
# On why I am against helmets
# My wife is a murderer
# A visit to Fab India, Chennai
# Oxymoronic life that we live in…

By Jamshed V Rajan

Jammy, as Jamshed V Rajan is affectionately called, is a wannabe stand up comedian. He has a funny take on most things but documents only some of them. If you are interested in chatting up with him, do drop him an email at jv.rajan@gmail.com or message him at +919650080255.

14 replies on “Different strokes for different folks”

Jammy You wanted to know what is the tiff between me and psg right… My reply is …
Podhu vazhaaikaila edhellam sagajamappa

looks like you have got your facts wrong. The stroke delivers the baby after he sees that the man and women going togther are having some physical cahnges. changes are

In Men
1. Looses their hair.
2. Looses their health
3. Losss his temper
4. and attention of the wife for some costly dress while shopping

In Women
1. Gains a upper hand in all the matters
2. Gains a big tummy even after so many gossips
3. Gains a frown even by your touch
4. looses the hubby for any babe going in a mini
5. Has a year long headache

PS.. more points can be added

kar le kar le tu ek sawal…. like KBC song… oops i am tired by the questions i face fm my kiddo, wonder how they get so many questions, the more we keep answering the more questions pop up….

Well if Rekha’s pregnant and you still believe in “strokes” — Nah, it wasn’t me (to the tune of Shaggy).

Uma: That was not very flattering…here I am saving this world from the bad, dark world and you say exactly the opposite….

BTW, whose side are you?

Flash Gordon: Thanks for correcting me of a mistake I have been repeating for the last 30 years. You now rank alongside Rekha as the most important people of my life. You still win though…Rekha only corrected my 20 year old belief on one of the commandments: ‘Love Thy Neighbour.”

Browser: Ohh…I believed that God gave us the kids till I got married to Rekha. I shudder to think what would have happened if Rekha also believed in God! There would have been no Rajans….and nobody would have guessed why!!

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