This is less of a poem and more of a ballad. This is the story of how Rekha and I met, our evil intentions, and how Rekha turned the tables on me.
How I brought your mother back
When I first saw her,
She was wearing something blue.
I thought: “I will take her out,
And all my dreams will come true.”
My dreams weren’t that good.
Lunch was at Velu Military Hotel*,
Little costly, but my wallet withstood.
Tipping a magnanimous Rs 5,
On my Yamaha, off we went.
I dropped her at her hostel,
Two hours well spent.
“Which way do you go to office?”
She asked as I kicked my bike to a start.
“Via your hostel, everyday”
Was my reply, very smart.
“Here is my number,” she said.
And I gave her mine.
I corrected myself on the bike,
And off I rode; on the seat a stiff spine.
Ah! Will take her around for six months,
And then dump her.
One more month to find another girl,
And into her ears, my love I will purr!
The next day, she called me at eight.
Five months and twenty-nine days to go.
Many such days went by,
Finally, it was only one more day to stow.
Rekha beat me to it. She asked:
“Rajan, shouldn’t we get married?”
“What? No way!” I replied.
“I am dude. Love, I have never carried!”
I was somebody who believed in quickies,
With Rekha cut off, I was happy.
I could now look for another girl.
But for no reason, I started feeling scrappy!
Rekha refused to see me.
Far apart we grew.
I looked for a girl to woo.
That’s when office gossip told me:
Somebody from Lowe Lintas was the bridegroom.
Rekha was to meet him,
In Hotel Sangeeta’s Family Room.
“How could this happen?” I asked my roomie.
He only let out a smirk.
I drank four beers.
And got to work.
I rang her father, but didn’t have the balls.
I called Rekha 17 times, but she didn’t answer.
I reached the hotel, and waited outside.
Jealousy filled me like cancer.
After an hour,
They came out. Shook hands.
He got her an auto & got in too.
The Earth below me turned to sands.
He dropped her at her hostel.
I had followed. From safe distance.
I was drunk with both beer & love.
This double drunk needed assistance.
After smoking five cigarettes outside,
I rode my Yamaha home.
Got into my bed and cried.
“I want Rekha as my bride!”
Next day, I told her.
What a fool I was to refuse her.
“Let us get married. I concur.”
She refused to accept my apology.
But quietly refused that Lintas groom.
It took me six more months,
Before Rekha would give me any room.
Six months later, she sat on my bike
I was love struck.
I didn’t want anybody else,
She was my lady luck!
After one more year of pleading
She agreed to marry this boy.
We were one happy couple.
I was Achilles and she my Helen of Troy.
It has been fifteen years since we met.
There have been ups and downs.
We aren’t that young anymore,
And have both gained our pounds.
But even today,
When I leave for office,
I kiss her on her forehead.
And that’s as good as my day would get.
That was before I became a house-husband,
Now she goes to office and gives me a list,
And if I do them right,
In the evening, I get kissed.
Important: Rekha, if you are reading this you should know that your husband didn’t have enough money to buy you the World but tried his best. If only his girl friend had lent him some money he would have got you a nice, expensive gift. But that bitch refused!
*Velu Military Hotel still exists at Nungambakkam, Chennai and its specialty is the way they show available non-vegetarian dishes for you to choose. To see their display, click here.