Every production unit in the World looks at inventing, patenting and then making shit loads of money. Yet, here is one idea that has not struck them. An idea that six billion earthlings will be willing to buy at the price it is quoted. Name of the product: Shirk-o-meter Bandwidth: Will help an

Somebody had said "Revenge is a dish best served cold" and they are still trying to find out who said it. Don`t believe me? Check out Wikipedia`s page on ‘revenge`. In the 33 years of my life, I have had my share of revenges. It all began when I

After Rhea (our baby) was born, Rekha and I fight over newer issues. Earlier we used to fight over who would watch the the television, whose family was better, the girl names I would mention by mistake, who looked fatter and not to mention Madhuri Dixit. But Rhea`s arrival

What is life made up of? Simple: Take a lie, add the F-word and you get L.I.F.E. Cool isn`t it? Anyway, I have arrived in life. Last evening I bought L`Oreal`s Out Of Bed Long Lasting Messed Up Effect hair gel! There did seem to be a conspiracy by the sales

[Warning: This is a long and boring article and requires holding of your nose at times.] I know this is a touchy subject and we find it obnoxious to talk of our toilet habits. But let us do it today! Indians have always mingled with nature to answer nature`s call. It seems

Lateral thinking is in action when an individual or a group tries to make incremental changes in a mature product. Did that go over your head? It did for me when I read it for the first time. Read it again, if it helps. A mature product is utility/item/gadget which

Sex between a man and woman could be great - provided you get between the right man and woman. - Woody Allen Till I was 19, I was more familiar with the different parts of Madurai than my own body. Then, came along Shalini Menon who changed everything. Her father owned

I will never forget how I tasted liquor for the first time. The biology teacher (whom I had a crush on, and thus went on to score 87% in XII so as to impress her) informed us that the next day we will be dissecting frogs and one of us

As part of becoming a father, there are some anniversaries I have to keep in mind. While I have forgotten most, here are the ones I remember. In this post, the dates have been changed so that nobody lands up in court after our kid becomes famous and claims to be

As you are all aware, my grand father was a farmer-shepherd. My father interned as a shepherd before finding out that it wasn`t his calling and moved to farming. Farming involved getting up early and sleep walking to the fields two kilometers away, with two well built bullocks pulling you

Did you know that the concept of shopping malls came up as early as the 1950s. Did you know that the biggest shopping mall is in Alberta, Canada ...a place where I actually have an old ...long lost friend called Jaron Rovensky (more on this dude soon). Did you know

Sex in India is different from the rest of the World. While we invent/discover/write kamasutras….we hide Debonairs and Playboys under our beds, yet to the world we are like: “Sex? Sorry…we are Indians.” The other day, Rekha saw a chat message from my ex-girlfriend and caught me: “Who is she?” ““Ah! Just

In a way, Bar Stools are like Super Models. They come with long legs, and are often found in the pubs. Rich, drunk men use them but only till around 1 am. Around this time, these men lose their ability to use both the Bar Stools and the Super Models.

The word has spread and all the nurses have ganged up against me in order to save Rekha her husband. This is the problem with today`s World - news travels fast. Esp, news of somebody being a flirt. My sense of humor didn`t help me either when I met my

If you have been following my escapades with air-hostesses here, here & here...you will like this write-up as well. Rhea, Rekha and I left Gurgaon on Wednesday morning and reached Madurai in the evening - all for 3-4 days of Diwali celebration with friends & relatives. Since Air Deccan doesn`t

Somebody once said, "It's a good idea to keep on good terms with everybody, especially with your wife, your banker, your stomach, and your conscience." If that somebody had worked in a corporate, he would have added 'colleagues' to that long list. Yesterday when my boss was chiding me for not

I got this as a forward from my ex-teammate and good friend Yuvraj (I like to call him Yuvraj Singh). It makes for a great reading and is really hilarious. Go ahead.... A ship sank in high seas and the following people got stranded on a beautiful deserted island in the middle

--------I didn't write this----------- A businessman boarded a plane to find, sitting next to him, an elegant woman wearing the largest, most stunning diamond ring he had ever seen. He asked her about it. "This is the Klopman diamond," she said. "It is beautiful, but there is a terrible curse that goes with

Sometimes, somethings are better linked. Ouchmytoe is one such thing, sometimes. Just in case (and I don`t mean a case of beer) you would like to display the latest articles from Ouchmytoe.com on your blog/website...we have a solution. Embed the Ouchmytoe widget on your blog in three easy steps: Step 1: Click

Jv.rajan@gmail.com: Hi, still up? My-Ex-Boss@youporn.com: Yeah. I am working on a strategy to make money for the company. Jv.rajan@gmail.com: In fact, I wanted to discuss my raise with you. My-Ex-Boss@youporn.com: Shouldn’t you be checking with your girl friends? Jv.rajan@gmail.com: No! I am talking about the annual appraisals. My-Ex-Boss@youporn.com: Ah! Mind you…. a petty criminal

It was Christmas Eve, and I was looking for some wine. I needed (more than wanted) to gift a bottle of alcoholic wine to one of my friend. Of late, I have got a liking for wine, for various reasons. One, it forms a nice costly gift, and two...after gifting it,

Rekha`s family has decided to strip me on the day of the marriage. Looks like the marriage will be sanctified in a temple. But this is only the good part. The bad part is, I can only wear a dhoti during the marriage. That leaves out my fat-laden, scar-ridden, breast-hanging torso

The Indian race is faced with a cruel choice: work or daytime Doordarshan. - Unknown I know the above maxim no longer stands true, because there is now Fashion TV, Zee Music and Pogo. But, the message that the maxim conveys - that life is not about choices - stands true even

Sometimes kids end up cracking the biggest of jokes. In order to pacify my three and a half year old daughter who had been scolded by my wife early in the morning, I told her: "Rhea, don't worry...sometimes your mother is too much." Pat came her reply: "Not too much. Mother

Wow! Rekha and I are now proud participants of a revolution initiated by Karl Benz way back in 1885. Yes! We are proud owners of a car - Suzuki Swift. At least, I am proud of it. Rekha had wanted a Mercedes Benz S-Class. As you can see her tastes

Click Here to View the Picture This pic was taken during the Republic Day celebrations, in Bihar. Don't know if it was snapped this year...or the year before. Look at the rest of the crowd...everybody is standing for the National Anthem. But Laloo Prasad Yadav and Rabri Devi are sitting even as

I didn`t realize but I have been quoted in this news item on Blog Bans, without my knowledge. One of the many prizes that I have to recieve for being a celebrity blogger ;-) Rekha and I are turning out to be a flashy couple, what with appearing in the newspapers at

I am not the kind to make fun of somebody`s mistakes - especially because my English teacher never made fun of me. She didn`t because she knew that I was eyeing her and if she showed more care towards me (coz I was weak), I might mistake that for love. There

If today I am a drunkard, I have to blame my mother. I still remember how as a five year old I would hate drinking that yucky glass of milk before I went to bed. Now, the glass of milk has been taken over by a bottle of beer. The graduation

This is the transcript of an ACTUAL radio conversation between a US Naval ship and the Canadians, off the coast of Newfoundland, Oct. 95. In case you didn`t know people of Newfoundlands are considered to be the Sardars of Canada...that is to say, most jokes in Canada are aimed at

We all know that every air plane in the air has a few people with cotton in their ear. They do this to avoid the air pressure getting to them. Read more about it here Now, I have a related question...I have heard that in New York, there are buildings with

Been reading a lot about podcasting and thought it was just the right time for me to experiment. Spent a good part of Sunday trying to record a funny audio clip for you ...but thanks to a defunct microphone in the headset Rekha gifted me, no recording happened. Have currently

I think man is a born businessman. As soon as he is born he starts crying for attention and when the doctor gives him a blanket for free...he stops crying. All you feminists out there, please bear with me. Though I mention him/he/man etc...I don`t mean to be unfair. I am

Four nights back Rekha turned towards me in bed and started at me. Been married to her for the last six years I knew this was a dangerous move. As a weapon, it ranked a little below Arnold Schwarzenegger's AMT Hardballer Longslide (with laser sighting) in the movie Terminator but

I have finally managed to get a story of mine on Rediff. It is on how to shop smart...esp with your wife around. Thanks to the Editor it sounds a lot better now! Read More

It is said that if one wants to know his/her true friends one should get a Sales job. Very true. I have heard it from everybody I have worked with….so must be true. This is one of the things for which you can’t rely on hearing it from the horse’s