I once attended a marriage in Rekha`s family. Today morning I was thinking about it...and wondered if you would be interested in knowing what some popular men/women have said about ‘madness and therapy`. What I say of ‘madness and therapy,` ie, how the marriage went ...will be the next post. We are

Three days back I met a girl in Gurgaon. Needless to say, she was pretty. I was smitten by her the moment I saw her - probably because I had spent six years in Chennai and was longing for somebody fair. If you are a Chennai woman you will have to

Ouchmytoe.com has come of age. Yesterday, the day India became independent, it got linked from www.samachar.com. Samachar.com - a Sify property which is visited by millions of NRIs every month (approximately 50 million...am not too sure) has found Ouchmytoe.com good enough to be showcased from their site. But why

On 19 July a contest titled "Can you put words into my mouth?" was announced on Ouchmytoe.com. On 28 July, 13 funny lines good enough to make it to Jammy`s speech bubble were selected and were made open to the public for voting. After a week of vigorous voting (during

Even as IPL got to a rousing start at ChinnaSwamy stadium in Bangalore, an old friend of mine called me and asked what team I was supporting. Being a south Indian, I opted for Bangalore Royal Challengers. After Brendon Barrie McCullum of Kolkata Knight Riders scored 158 off just 73

Many movies have been directed and many stories written about what can happen if we hear people speak their mind. That is, if besides hearing what people say...we also hear what they want to say but don`t. Here are some scenarios which could sound funny - Executive: I will be getting promoted

On Sunday last we bought a pram for Rhea - our baby. Believe me, getting the right pram is a difficult task. You could be fooled too. Rekha walked up to me on Saturday morning and said: "We need to buy pram." "I think, ‘p` is silent...for I have only heard

What we call 'Progress' is the exchange of one nuisance for another nuisance. - Havelock Ellis (1859 - 1939)Ouchmytoe will soon be moving to a domain. The first steps have been taken - designing of the website. While most conporates prefer their launches to be surprises...Ouchmytoe thinks otherwise. It lets

My apologies. I was held up with work. Not my fault. Who doesn`t get held up with work. At last count more people get held up due to work than those due to traffic. I love it when somebody calls out "T.G.I.F" when I enter office. It is a sweet smelling,

Those of you who read the earlier post on Taj Mahal being shifted to Pune are probably cursing me. Here is a blogger who has done one better. Check out what Hul, also known as ‘Infinite Yellow` (view his Blog here) has sent me. And he has the cheek to

I can now reveal the news I have been trying to hide from the World for the last three months. Perhaps, Rekha has given me the go ahead because she knows she will anyway give away the secret herself. One really can`t hide from the World that one is pregnant

This is a post, which can be used against me the day I run for Mayor`s office in Chennai. Or after I become the Indian President. Remember US President George Bush faced trouble over his drug revelations. Or was it Arnold ‘Terminator` Schwarzenegger? When I was young...I said No to drugs.

Did you know that Ouchmytoe has gone live with a Cricket Blog? If you knew it... great, but if you didn`t know it...don`t even bother....it is just a bunch of links put together for AdSense revenue.  ------X-------X------ Today, I missed the Australian innings of the India vs Australia Champions Trophy match. As

I can now say that I am a much married man. I say ‘much married` because we crossed our second wedding anniversary on 8th September. Despite the body and mind willing (actually, more of the body) I haven`t married many times.  Have you notices that the word "Harried" rhymes with the

There are people like this. For the world they are the gift to mankind...and deep down inside ...or for that matter beneath a thin layer of brasso, they are green and slimy.

What would happen if tomorrow all men in the World stop lying? They will start dying. Simple. You probably think I said the men would be dying because it rhymed with lying. No...if I wanted a word that rhymed with lying...I would have gone with - crying, spying, eyeing, flying, sighing

Somebody had said "Revenge is a dish best served cold" and they are still trying to find out who said it. Don`t believe me? Check out Wikipedia`s page on ‘revenge`. In the 33 years of my life, I have had my share of revenges. It all began when I

Rhea is now 20 months old and it has been a long journey. If I were to draw a parallel, it has been like crossing the Niagara Falls on a tight walk rope. That`s why in the last 20 months, while playing with Rhea I have always sat down on

When I was growing up...and was still a student... traveling to school by bus had an advantage - you could say, "Mam, the bus was late." But there were two worry points - first it meant your pocket money was going into the conductor`s brown leather bag and second the girls

Heard about this Chennai guy who recently got caught between a concrete wall and a corporation bus? He lost both his left hand and left leg. According to the latest reports...he is all right! Monday post coming soon. :-)

The Klein family united via Yahoo Groups! One of the daughters of two split sisters set up a group and sent across messages to all Judys born on April 7, 1940. This letter was also put up on the Group home page for all others to see. The KleinFamily Group

In the last ten years, the fuel prices have really gone up. One would have thought with Iraq under US control (well, almost) and all other parts of the World where fuel is found under US influence, the World would be a better place to live in. But no. I have

I was in Manipal to give a TEDx Talk recently. Find more details about it here. The experience was exhilarating to say the least. It all started with an innocent little mail in my inbox one day. It read: Dear Sir, We invite you to speak at TEDx Manipal to

Situation: Girl friend has cleaned up her main course at the family restaurant but the boy friend is yet to go beyond the chicken soup he had ordered. "No wonder you are fat!" Yes, that`s precisely what the boyfriend ends up saying, even though he wanted to say: "Honey, you look

Who said it is only guys who harass the ladies? I was once sexually harassed by a lady...just that in my case I was disappointed. The lady happen to be Veronica, my neighbour's dog.

As usual, by afternoon I had to apologize and patch up. If you are married, you probably empathize with me. But if you aren`t you probably think I am a hen-pecked husband. Before I even start proving that I am not hen-pecked, let me tell you that being hen-pecked is not

Everything is funny as long as it is happening to somebody else. - Will Rogers (You bet sir. For I don`t think what is happening to me is comedy...but these guys who are regular readers of my marriage woes think it is funny) The most exciting phrase to hear in science, the one

You don`t marry a girl. You marry her relatives. While some agree that that marriage is the fastest way of transferring funds or bringing in a change of management, I believe that it is the quickest way to insanity. I recently visited Bangalore for I was invited to a marriage in Rekha`s

A 28-year old man has found a condom in a 2-liter Pepsi bottle. He and his wife had gone to Khandala for a nice weekend, and after booking a hotel room, they asked for room service. Even as the requested Pepsi bottle arrived, the couple got cozy. Soon, a condom materialized

Just like the tortoise boss, the arm chair boss, the peanut boss, the skirt boss and the dolphin boss, there are many types of fathers in law. I am not bluffing here - these boss types real but this post wouldn`t elaborate because it is dedicated to father in laws.

This is a joke my father once told me. It seems Winston Churchill was visiting India and Jawahar Lal Nehru took him on an early morning walk around the Teen Murti Bhavan. Midway through the walk, Churchill pointed to a man squatting by the roadside and asked Nehru, "What is that

The best thing about marriage is that you are never short of reasons to dive into a fight. I foresee Rekha and me being toothless, all wrinkled up like a soaked-for-two-days raisin (‘kismis` for Indian readers), and still fighting it out. The reason though escapes my mind. So, as you

I have a cool hairstyle (see my pic on this page). But not all are as lucky, like for example you. Ever seen yourself in the mirror? God forbid, but did you swoon and hit your temple on the ceramic sink and die? Hairstyles are of many types. Some can be

Here are some of the sentences that I can never forget. Some I can never understand. Here I have listed both the type of sentences. Sentences that I have never understood... May the Lord rest in peas. (Why should the Lord rest in peas? Is that his favorite food? If that is true...how

The headset with microphone, which Rekha gifted me, actually works. Just that I didn`t know technology. Here is yours sincerely, presenting his first Podcast. It talks of why I sound like Britney Spears, what Rekha and I share in common, Athens Olympics, Michael Jackson, Raj Kapoor, Mera Naam Joker, Steve Martin

We are only one day away from becoming fools. Yes, yours sincerely is referring to the All Fools Day. Being the sober Blog that it is, Ouchmytoe has lined up a list of popular pranks mainstream media has played on its readers since time immemorial. The intension of this write-up

Fortunately or unfortunately, my baptism did not involve wine. Instead, it was rum.  It all started when I was in class X. My biology teacher Mrs Geeta Kumari asked me to bring a dash of alcohol to school so that I could in-sensitize the frog I would dissect the following day. My

If you aren`t a smart person, you probably think Silicon Valley is Pamela Anderson`s cleavage. No! Just because Pamela Anderson has gone for silicon implants...one can`t take it literally. Silicon Valley is the southern part of San Francisco Bay Area, Northern California, USA and a region where high-tech companies (and

On Friday, I reached office at 10 a.m. and left at 3 a.m. the next day. In a single day, I transitioned from a hardly working, to a hard working employee. Earlier in the day, my boss had asked me to work late and I remember putting up stiff resistance. I entered